Ok so I am 32 weeks pregnant and have 3 kids already one of which the father recently won't let me see because i moved on and became pregnant I have been on bedrest since like 5weeks my boyfriend works from 11am to 11pm and always comes home drunk or doesn't come at all I have never been suicidal untel the past year two its not that i want to die I just feel so bad in this life and helpless and hurt I live far from family and friends I feel alone and my boyfriend I know is seeing someone else he is always mia phone off coming home with glitter I found emails to escorts I didnt want another baby but he did and I thought we would have a happy family but now its jus not that I use to hav a older suger daddy and my bf constantly calls me awful thangs and such and it hurts everything hurts I try so hard not lose it bt las night he didnt come home tell 2am drunk when it was his first day off after workn 16 hr days I missd hm and ws despritaly wanting hm stay cuz i had been bleeding and was scared and lonely but he left anyhow so when he came home we fought I wanted the blanket to sleep on the couch and he said no he paid for it and i could go sleep with an old man for money I gt furious threw.the tv down it cracked so he went in living room and punched that tv then It gt foggy bt I hit him with.the lamp he then came out the room with a shirt wrapped around his arm sais i cut him and he was pressing charges so I seen the peices of light bulb on the floor and said I got cuts to and cut my arm but way worsr then I thought I intended to he cryed and helped me bandage it up but idk wat to do I cant tell dr am scared they will take my baby but is this pregnancy hormones with stress or am i really losing my mind and need help before I become worse
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