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Been married for 24 years... Husband never got blackout drunk until retirement party.. He doesn't drink often and isn't alcoholic. Well he got blackout drunk a cheated, yes I caught them kissing... he's 43 and she is 22... She was drunk but not that drunk but husband was blackout drunk and he said he can't remember nothing... I could probably forgive for the kiss but the what may have happened before that.. They were so close there wasn't daylight between them...  Yes clothes were on but they were sweaty and outside the security light and when I said what the hell are ya'll doing they looked like deers caught in headlights... The girl isn't talking and changed her story 3 times and now won't talk at all.. Trying to figure out what I should do... I'm having a hard time with this... That's not the only problem since then he has had a problem having sex but not a few times.. I thought our marriage was great but after this situation I'm not so sure... All kinds of things run threw my head... They other thing is we have a 22 year old daughter together also.. Please be kind because this is the hardest thing I've had to deal with.. Thanks

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I can understand your dilemma. However, what happened was probably not entirely his fault. If he doesn't drink much, I would think that he was coerced to drink too much, or more likely his drink was spiked. He is probably mortified, and is worried about what might have happened (probably nothing much); hence is performance problem.

I would think he has been faithful all your married life and needs you more than ever. I would suggest you decide whether you can forgive him whatever happened. If you can, then take it from there. Tell him you still love him, and are willing to forgive him. Don't jeopardise a ¼ century marriage because of what happened that appears to be so out of character and possibly beyond his control. Talk together - in love!

I hope this helps as a start.

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