subutex detox/ withdrawal

Hi

Ive never posted on a site like this before, but i have enjoyed reading other people posts and have found them both informative and helpful.

Im 42, have been a long term addict, mainly heroin. Have done many detoxs in the past with little succes at staying clean long term.

About 7 years ago my doctor started prescribing me subutex, and to be honest at the time and for about 4 years after my life changed, i felt it was a wonder drug, i led a normal life, or as normal a life i could have led considering i was still in active addiction, lets not dress it up, subutex is using, i gained qualifications and formed a great relationship with my kids. Now prior to my doctor putting me on subutex i had tried it before when a friend gave it to me and told me to sniff it, which i did and since being prescribed i have for the past 7 years been sniffing my subutex, i know its not ideal, i justified it by saying to myself well at least u can have your coffe in the morning without having to wait for the big chunky pill to dissolve and it also became a habit and the norm, i certainly wouldn't advise it nor would i encourage it.

Anyway, i started realising that my life being lived almost artificially, constantly cloudy, no motivation, not able to have a laugh and occassionally short tempered, my youngest daughter at 5 has never seen the real me, sad, i made a decision to come off and started reducing a few months back, am now down to 0.4mg, however and i know this isn't ideal, but still sniffing, i have managed to stop smoking both cigarettes and cannabis which the later i was smoking continuously for about 5 years since being on the subs, cigarettes i thought i would never stop and so far i have for about 2 weeks, i also dont drink and look after myself physically by going to the gym plus eating well.

Detoxing from subs seems so drawn out, i mean i wanted to have come off before new year, tonight i sat hear so frustrated, i have never wanted a drug out of my system so bad so i have decided to jump off tomorrow, i will go to the chemist as i get daily pickup, as opposed to fortnightly which i used to get,( i asked fore daily because i would sometimes in the past take more than i should have), and get my 0.4 and just keep it just in case, i know this is a small amount but if im sniffing this stuff will the 0.4 be more like 0.8 and if so im a little worried about what to expect, yes i have done detoxs in the past and have suffered many withdrawals plus cold turkeys, but its been so long ive almost forgot what its like, plus i have barely felt the drops, seriously the only symptom im feeling is the cold and it being the middle of winter its like im in a freezer. Not sure what i want from this, maybe some support, words of encouragement, success stories, and please i ve heard all the oh you shouldn't be sniffing the stuff as its a little bit late i feel for that now lol and yes im aware its still using behaviour, and a bit silly, but using is  the furthest thing from my mind at this time in my life.

Hope i can keep to my plan tomorrow and will update as i go.

Thanks in advance for any replys

SM