I have extreme anger problems. I have been to a therapist and she sort of helped me. but that was for another issues I am constantly mean to my mother(Nene - adopted Mom) and my animals. (I'm adopted. Message me for details) I think this stems from my real mother, Jenn. She is up and down in her life. Constantly on drugs, and in and out of rehab. She says she is gonna change but she doesn't I'm so f*****g sick of her. I just want her to move away and never come back. She is the worst mother ever. I don't know how or why I love her.
This morning, the cable went out due to a bill not getting paid. I told Nene that she needed to stop so I could talk. She told me that I was being rude. This made me smash the fridge and cause cereal boxes to fall off. Then she yelled at me for that. So I went into my room, slammed the door, and threw stuff around. I went back out after a few minutes and she said I needed to find the check book. So I looked for it and she told me I needed to get off my ass and look. I yelled at her, Saying I AM LOOKING SHUT UP! She told me to Knock it off. I told her she needed to sit down and be quiet. I ended up solving the problem with her nagging me, which made me yell at her even more.
Another example of this is one day about two years ago. I let our three dogs outside and they would not come in. I stood on the porch screaming to them GET THE f**k IN HERE NOW!!. After about ten minutes of this screaming, I punched the wall by the door resulting in a huge hole in the wall. I got punished for that and put another hole in the wall down by my bedroom wall. That hole was fixed. I just can't stand it when people don't listen to me, or do what I say.
My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 8 months now. I love him but he is constantly complaining that I am mean. I try not to be. But it pisses me off when this short ass b***h Taylor gets all over him. He told me she grabbed his man parts in the hallway. I laughed at that, then got angry later. He also told me that she yells I LOVE YOU down the hallway in school. Our relationship isn't very public. I don't want it to be either. Taylor knows we are dating and she asked him out in September. He said no. In September came up to me saying " if you don't stop starting sh*t with me and staring at me I'm gonna punch you in your fat face b***h just keep it up" I said in response "Do it. You won't. You probably couldn't even reach my face. Stupid troll" She apologized for this but I still refuse to be friends with her. I just hate her so much. I just want to beat the sh*t out of her.
I really want to stop treating people like this because it is causing me to lose friendships. Please help me.