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Hey, 

I'm in a really horrible place.  I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 years, but we've lived together for 2.5 years. I'm 23 and he is 28.  We met while I was in college, so he moved into my parents house to be with me (it's kind of a long story, but that part isn't relevant.)  We have a great relationship.  He's always been there for me, which was especially amazing given the stuff I've had to put up with this year.  This past year has been tragic for my family and me.  First, we lost my grandmother in a car accident in August- my little sister/best friend was in the car, so she suffers from PTSD.  My mom was really close to my grandmother, so this was especially difficult for her.  She isn't exactly stable as it is, so this really brought out a new side to her craziness (which is understandable, don't get me wrong, but it can be a lot to handle).  My dad has always been a sane, positive, and all around good person who everyone in town knows and loves... He kind of held us together through this really hard time.  In February, he literally just dropped dead.  His heart stopped.  He was a healthy guy, so this was a huge shock.  As you can imagine, we were devastated.  My mom went even further off the deep end and began threatening to kill herself... then we found out my dad had been cheating on her... so she got even crazier.  My sisters and I had to suck it up and take care of her, even when she would say incredibly insensitive things about our father and basically tell us she didn't care about any of us at all anymore.  My boyfriend stayed by my side through all this, being my shoulder to cry on whenever I needed him.  He and my dad were really close so this hit him pretty hard too.  It was just so nice to have him support me.  A couple months later, things finally started to settle down with my mom and it seemed like things were going to get back to normal... but out of the blue my boyfriend dumps me- on the five month anniversary.  I really don't understand what happened.   He told me he was moving back home (across the country) and he was sorry to have to leave me in this situation (meaning my crazy mom.) He stayed at my house  for five days after he broke up with me.  I asked him to take a break from work in those five days and spend time with me- he did and we had an amazing time.  We never have fights and we are best, best friends.  He made it clear that his reason for leaving had nothing to do with me, but he couldn't live in my house anymore.  I asked if I could come with him, but he told me no, he needed to be alone for a while.  We had originally planned to move out on our own in September, so I was really looking forward to escaping from my mother... but now it seems like I'm stuck here.  My boyfriend says this is a "break" and that we'll probably get back together in two months when he feels better about himself.  We agreed not to hook up with anyone, but he doesn't want to talk any more than once a week.  He's really quiet when it comes to other people, so it's not like he wants to go out and live the single lifestyle.  He told me he just wants to go home and cry until he figures himself out.  The day he left we were both crying really hard and he kept telling me he loved me- I don't understand why he's doing this to us... it seems so random and stupid.  He claims it will help him figure out if he wants to be together forever, but my question is WHY NOW?  It seems so absurd that he would just up and leave after he's seen how horrible my mother can be, especially to me.  The day after he left, she started screaming at me- throwing plates and slamming cabinets.  I'm literally heart broken and I can't take all this.  I just want to be with him.  I don't blame him for wanting to get out of here, but why ruin a perfectly good thing in the process?  I feel so abandoned and betrayed, but all I want to do is fly to his house.  Obviously, I know that would make me a psycho ex, but I can't handle this and I have no where to go.  What do I do?  I don't have enough money to move out yet and I want to be with my boyfriend in the long run...  He said he was 90% sure we would be together again and I don't want to ruin that chance by signing a lease somewhere else.  I sound really pathetic, but it's not like it seems.  It really was an awesome relationship- he would tell you the same.  Everyone was shocked when I told them, they originally thought I was going to tell them I was engaged.  I just am so lost right now...  I have no idea how I'm going to get through this without him.  I'm scared I'm going to end up hating him for abandoning me when I need him the most.  It's not like I was crying all the time or being negative- I'm a very positive person, so I can't imagine that he would be sick of me complaining or something.  How do I make him realize this is a huge mistake?  I really need him right now... I can't do this alone.  I can't live here.  Any advice? 

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That's very sorry to hear about your family .Maybe he just needs a little time off to cool down ,relax , and go into his own world for the time being. So much has happened . I sometimes feel like that with my friends. Yes it may be different cause you've got a boyfriend that wants to be away , and I've got friends but I know he must still love you. He just needs to let out everything that's weighing down his shoulders and sinking his heart. I've had those feelings before ... He loves you . But he just needs his own space and world for now. But I must say , its not good that he demands only twice a week conversations . You both could lose contact. But maybe he just needs his own space I'll just say that as an answer for that conversation limit cause Im not sure what his reason could be. But leaving you definitely means he just needs hisown world And deep thoughts to reflect.
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