Decided to Have My Son Circumcised at 13

10 is about the age when boys start to become seriously interested in masturbation. What you describe sounds severe for that age (10). If your mom wanted to get you radically cut like this, she should have had it done when you were 7 or 8, or early in your 9th year, not after 9.5 at the latest, and preferably a lot earlier.

How does reading about HIV risk reduction convince a parent to decide to circumcise their son or make them pro-circumcision? I'm genuinely curious.

I mean specifically, if the parent is religious, are they thinking the son is going to be sexually promiscuous and don't plan on him being faithful to one woman? if they are not religious, do they think the same, that is he going to be promiscuous and not use protection or take care in who he sleeps with? To me it feels like they think the worst about their son. They just think HIV is bad, and circumcision reduces the risk (allegedly), so let's get him cut, not questioning whether he's even going to be in an at-risk demographic. Any parent willing to go to these lengths to reduce HIV risk is surely (I hope) going to go to the lengths to teach their kid to have safe sex if not save themselves for marriage if they are religious.

I don't mean to sound accusing. I am genuinely curious what the thought process is like. I'm guessing it's not a thinking slow situation but a thinking fast situation.

That said, I'm disappointed in my parents for having me cut. I think they were thinking fast and not slow, just listening to what people said uncritically. That doesn't excuse them in my eyes (and they have not apologized which would have gone a long way but it is still my duty to forgive them). I know they or at least my mom wanted to be a good parent- but she was a bad parent in many ways besides this but this was the one single worst thing she could have done, but I have to forgive her. We will receive new bodies in heaven and nobody bled more than Jesus (the circumcision wasn't even the same as that done to Jesus or in the OT). Sorry I don't mean to preach. I get carried away. I am just wondering though- did my parents think I would be at risk for HIV/AIDS? Or did they think I couldn't clean myself? Or did they think I would have had such low self esteem as to feel like a loser in the shower rooms when in junior high? I guess I don't understand. And if so, I can tell you, they didn't do a lot to build my self esteem or make me athletic to begin with. It's not that I'm mad. It's that I'm seeing all these contradictions and my logical mind wants to figure them out, and figure out my parents. Maybe there's nothing to figure out but I want to try. It's like they want to have other people do all the work of parenting for them - the doctor, the school system, etc. Besides my circumcision and wasting so many years killing so much potential figuring so much out myself (my grandfather was epic but he died when I was young), and my dad was so far from him in terms of accomplishment, that I had potential that was not realized. I could have gone so far if someone would have invested in me, but I have gone far enough on my own. I will give my sons and daughters the best I can, if I have them. Nobody is perfect, no parent is perfect, but when it comes to circumcision, I just don't get it. It makes no sense. He's Christian, so I wonder if he has read the bible. It's not required. I know they were deceived. If they would but apologize. Well my mom has passed and my dad won't understand. He's a boy. They were a pair. And my grandpa- who was quite amazing- I am aware he probably had my dad cut so nobody is perfect. Maybe he was cut too. I don't know. All I know is it ends with me.

To me, neither HIV (because I'm not sleeping with 100 other people or dudes), not cleanliness (because I can wash), nor appearance (because I do not have such low self-esteem or obsessiveness with foreskin- only the lack of it), nor penile cancer (because it's what 1 in 10,000,000? And that in old age?), nor religious reasons, because it's not required, nor is it the same type as in the OT, nor anything else is good reason but I have a lot of good reasons not to, that even if are just 10 percent likely to be true are more than enough reason not to (and I think they're 99% likely to be true).

I didn't mean to preach. I just don't get the HIV argument. Do you think your kid is going to be a swinger?

"After reading the latest findings about circumcision helping to prevent HIV transmission, I finally decided to have my son circumcised."

What does HIV transmission have to do with your 13 year-old son? Does he plan on having unprotected sex with infected partners? If not, he can make that decision as an adult when he's more capable of understanding the implications of the permanent destruction of healthy, specialized, non-diseased tissue.

Although I think the surgery is barbaric, if the boy is old enough to decide for himself, that he wants the surgery, especially if there is a medical reason that he should be allowed to make that decision for himself nobody else. It’s the boys body and it should be his decision, whether or not to have it done.

Teenage circumcision should in most cases be avoided unless he is really insistent. Peer pressure and be the cause. tell him they are just jealous that he has the whole natural thing. Let him decide after 18 or in his twenties. Forced circumcision often results in resentment. I've known guys forced into circumcision after age 2 or so. Psychologically says to avoid circumcision after age 6 until teenage if the guy is insistent about it or has a physical issue that causes infections, fissures or some real medical reason. Tell him to wait until he's an adult.

I am 36 and I am uncircumcised. Growing up in America whenever I would go to the pool I noticed everyone else seemed to be circumcised in the locker room. I have been very self conscious about my foreskin. I'm married and my wife says she doesn't have a preference but has admitted she likes the look of a circumcised penis. Had my parents offered getting me circumstances when I was 10 I would have been very happy to have it done.

Actually, that's far from truth. The basic reason why circumcision in Europe is not common is cultural. Europeans follow the classical Greek standards for male body, and the same was true in the Roman Empire. Adversity towards circumcision was so adamant that even St. Paul had to come up with Christian teaching acceptable to converts with "Gentile" background. Second reason is that there is no sound medical evidence that circumcision is anywhere close to merrits given to the procedure by American pediatric and urology associations. And the third reason is that Europe was rarely a place of 'hollier-than-thou' prudish ethics, ao typically and so recognizably American and Protestant.