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Long time ago, when I was young I would wish this stage, but no now. I am feeling flat and emotionless. And I am not supposed to be. There are so beautiful things that are happening to me, lately. That makes me even emptier. I do not understand this and I think that I really need help, but how?

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Yes, you need help. If you do not find one, you will miss all that beautiful things that are happening to you. When I was reading your writing, I thought how difficult that may be to be emotionless and feel that. Maybe a talk with your family would help you, or even give you an idea how to solve this thing.
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