Okay. I'm pretty confused here. Here is the somewhat long story. My friend (girl) has been trying to hook me up with someone for quite some time now. She showed me someone that she suggested on Facebook, I liked her, we kept in touch for like 6 months. She lived in Wisconsin and was moving out here. She actually has been out here quite a bit, but goes back and forth from SF, LA, and Wisconsin. Her main base is LA though.
The week she moved out here, we went out on a date. Date went well, and I asked her out on another date afterwards. She said yes, and our next date was on Valentines Day. Again, it went well. I got a kiss, blah blah. After this, we started hanging out a few times a week. She has a pretty busy schedule, but she was making it work out.
We started "dating" for a month. Again, everything seemed fine. She kept talking about things we could do months from now. How she'd have to get used to my music I listened to. Stuff like that. So that to me insinuated that she wanted to date. I started getting attached to her.
I went out of town for work for about 4 days. It ended up being a bad trip for me, which didn't help with my temporary depression! I get a text from her saying "hey, I just wanted to make sure we were both on the same page. I don't want anything serious. At least not yet. Just wanted to make sure we were on the same page." So, I replied back, "ok, no problem." She said in there "at least not yet." So, I figured she meant, let's wait a few more months before we actually do anything serious.
Turns out, the reason she sent me that text was because she went up to SF to hook up with her ex-boyfriend for 2 days. All she told me was that she went up to SF for the weekend, but I put 2 and 2 together. The entire time she was up there with him, she never texted me back once. After I came back, we hung out still, but much less. I got sick and didn't want to get her sick, so I told her I didn't want to kiss her or whatever until I was better. I was only sick for a week. The day I got better, I tried hanging with her but it took like 4 days to actually do something. I kissed her when I saw her, and immediately when I did that, she stopped for a second and told me. "Hey, I just wanted to make sure again that you knew that I don't really want a boyfriend right now. I haven't been single once since I've been in California, and I just don't want anything serious. But I'm fine with hooking up."
That made it a little awkward for me, but I just said, "yeah, you mentioned that already through text when I was gone and I said it was fine." She double checked again, and I said the same thing. We hooked up that night, then I left. I haven't seen her since. It's been a week. The reason for that is because her ex-boyfriend came down from SF to LA for the week for spring break (the day after she told me that line again). He came straight to her place, they went to the beach, hung out all week. (only reason I know this is because of Facebook. deadly tool). I would honestly have been totally fine with this, due to the discussion she had with me about hooking up only, but It's almost as if she's trying to hide from him that she is fooling around with me. Every time he is around she doesn't even attempt to text me/contact me.
I knew he was in town for at least 2 days, so I didn't ask to hang out with her during that time as to not make it awkward. But, I didn't know when he was leaving. So I texted her on the 3rd day to see if she wanted to do something, and she didn't respond for 36 hours (because he was still here). She knew I was leaving town this morning, and said "sorry i never texted you back yesterday. have fun on your trip though!" she is leaving town for a week on sunday to go visit her parents back home.
So, here is my issue. I got attached to her, and now I can't really get her out of my head. What's confusing me is that I am almost completely turned off by her immaturity, yet it still bothers me. I never texted her back last night, and I'm not going to text her back until she asks ME to hang out, or asks ME to see how I'm doing. If she does ask to do something when she gets back, should I continue hooking up with her, or should I just end it completely and see if she just wants to be friends? Normally, I never want a relationship, but for her it was different because she kind of insinuated it and I liked her a lot. It seems to me like she really likes her ex, and that I am just the 3rd wheel to keep her going. I look a lot like her ex. (Her and her ex cheated on each other the whole time they dated too, I recently learned).
I don't know. Need opinions. Thanks.
The week she moved out here, we went out on a date. Date went well, and I asked her out on another date afterwards. She said yes, and our next date was on Valentines Day. Again, it went well. I got a kiss, blah blah. After this, we started hanging out a few times a week. She has a pretty busy schedule, but she was making it work out.
We started "dating" for a month. Again, everything seemed fine. She kept talking about things we could do months from now. How she'd have to get used to my music I listened to. Stuff like that. So that to me insinuated that she wanted to date. I started getting attached to her.
I went out of town for work for about 4 days. It ended up being a bad trip for me, which didn't help with my temporary depression! I get a text from her saying "hey, I just wanted to make sure we were both on the same page. I don't want anything serious. At least not yet. Just wanted to make sure we were on the same page." So, I replied back, "ok, no problem." She said in there "at least not yet." So, I figured she meant, let's wait a few more months before we actually do anything serious.
Turns out, the reason she sent me that text was because she went up to SF to hook up with her ex-boyfriend for 2 days. All she told me was that she went up to SF for the weekend, but I put 2 and 2 together. The entire time she was up there with him, she never texted me back once. After I came back, we hung out still, but much less. I got sick and didn't want to get her sick, so I told her I didn't want to kiss her or whatever until I was better. I was only sick for a week. The day I got better, I tried hanging with her but it took like 4 days to actually do something. I kissed her when I saw her, and immediately when I did that, she stopped for a second and told me. "Hey, I just wanted to make sure again that you knew that I don't really want a boyfriend right now. I haven't been single once since I've been in California, and I just don't want anything serious. But I'm fine with hooking up."
That made it a little awkward for me, but I just said, "yeah, you mentioned that already through text when I was gone and I said it was fine." She double checked again, and I said the same thing. We hooked up that night, then I left. I haven't seen her since. It's been a week. The reason for that is because her ex-boyfriend came down from SF to LA for the week for spring break (the day after she told me that line again). He came straight to her place, they went to the beach, hung out all week. (only reason I know this is because of Facebook. deadly tool). I would honestly have been totally fine with this, due to the discussion she had with me about hooking up only, but It's almost as if she's trying to hide from him that she is fooling around with me. Every time he is around she doesn't even attempt to text me/contact me.
I knew he was in town for at least 2 days, so I didn't ask to hang out with her during that time as to not make it awkward. But, I didn't know when he was leaving. So I texted her on the 3rd day to see if she wanted to do something, and she didn't respond for 36 hours (because he was still here). She knew I was leaving town this morning, and said "sorry i never texted you back yesterday. have fun on your trip though!" she is leaving town for a week on sunday to go visit her parents back home.
So, here is my issue. I got attached to her, and now I can't really get her out of my head. What's confusing me is that I am almost completely turned off by her immaturity, yet it still bothers me. I never texted her back last night, and I'm not going to text her back until she asks ME to hang out, or asks ME to see how I'm doing. If she does ask to do something when she gets back, should I continue hooking up with her, or should I just end it completely and see if she just wants to be friends? Normally, I never want a relationship, but for her it was different because she kind of insinuated it and I liked her a lot. It seems to me like she really likes her ex, and that I am just the 3rd wheel to keep her going. I look a lot like her ex. (Her and her ex cheated on each other the whole time they dated too, I recently learned).
I don't know. Need opinions. Thanks.
Loading...
Okay heres the thing if the girl really like you she wouldnt be doing any of this right now if shes trying to hide from her ex her relationship with you then that oviously spells it out that she wants something with her ex again i mean they spend time together and when they do she doesnt text you which means she doesnt care a gurl that cares wouldnt do that i believe you should just tell her you want to be friends because shes using you everytime some thing isnt going right with her and her ex i kno u like the girl but real talk shes just messing with you and completely has no respect for you and i can tell your a really good man because you have put up with all of this from her
Loading...
I am only in middle school but dude it soinds like she just doesn't want to be bored anywhere she goes. If i were you i would say you give it some time then get a commitment. Hope it helps.
-Orageninja2012
Loading...
You don't mention your age or hers but you say you had to go out of town for work so I assume you are not in grade school. The story you told sounds more like a grade school romance than an adult relationship. I think you need to get on with your life.
Loading...