Im 30 years old. About 2 years ago I met a girl and we began a "hookup" type relationship. She, right from the start, wanted to date me. She told me she had strong feelings for me. Her expression of her feelings for me were constant and persistent- she never really went into phases where she said she didn't like me anymore. The feelings Seemed stable. About 2-3 months into the relationship which is basically a good friendship where we also hook up but are not "dating" yet. She would get mad at me for not coming to her house to see her- complaining that she was always coming to me. She would act unreasonably mad. One day I sarcastically said she was acting bipolar and that's when she told me she's bipolar clinically and that her father is also bipolar. For me- this was a red flag and I decided a genuine romantic relationship would never happen. We continued to hook up on and off- her still saying she wanted to date but me always resisting. I never told her I wouldn't date her but just said I wasn't ready for a relationship. We eventually went into a period where we didn't talk as much anymore, still talking some, but not as much. We stopped hooking up but still text a couple of times a week. 

The past few months we have reconnected sexually and emotionally. She tells me she loves me and wants to spend her life with me- etc. it's like a sales pitch- constantly telling me. It's like she's waiting for a to commit. I'm coming around and the bipolar thing not as much of an issue to me anymore. 

For the most part- she seems pretty normal most of the time- when she's working. Any day of the week where she's not working the following morning - she is out drinking until 3 in the morning. She lives in NYC. And then she's always basically unreachable the following day and says she's sleeping when I ask her why she wouldn't answer. 

 

I can't decide if I should commit to her. I could love her. I know I could but I'm afraid that her feelings are a lie and she doesn't know how she really feels. I don't know what she does when she disappears. When she goes out drinking in the city. I'm a good hearted man- I can love normally and healthily and can also get hurt. 

 

What should I do?