Couldn't find what you looking for?

TRY OUR SEARCH!

I'll tell ya what,there has got to be a full moon. You know that my hub is suspected of "steppin out" now my daughters bf of 4 years has got the bug too, what the hell is going on???
She will be 21 in September (hence our vegas trip) and has been with this kid for 4 years. They have broken up before but only for a short time.
He has not been round the house since last Sunday, which is odd because i see him here quite a lot. He was supposed to come over last nite (fri) but called her and said it was to late, it was only 10 pm, as he has showed up much later than that on several occasions.
She looked defeated and went to bed. Now, i have an ok relationship with him so i decided to text him just to say "wats up" and to tell him it's fine that he come over that late. He texted back and said, "it's all good, lol, just to late" Bout 5 minutes after his first text, he sent me another saying that he thinks he may want to meet other people and that G (my daughter) is fabulous and awesome and that she would make a great wife someday and that he doesn't want to stand in her way and that he is checkin out a few other people.

Yikes....we went back and forth for a few and ended with my asking him if he wanted me to talk with her, he never texted back. She got up this morning and i asked if she had talked to him, she said no. She went off to a birthday party for one of her co workers little girls, she went with her best girlfriend. SHE DOESN'T KNOW!!!!
Do i tell her, or just let her go on thinking everything is status quo? I feel so bad, she is so sweet and i sometimes get so mad at her because she kisses this kids fanny.
Now, when he lowers the boom, i will be on call. She will cry and not eat for days and also insist that i lay in bed with her while she cries, she will be mad and tell me to stop asking questions, then in the same breath she will blurt it out. It will be terrible, i get so worked up, i hate to see her hurt. Not to long ago they talked about getting an apartment together, she decided to stay home and save some more money. She is serious minded, he still has a child like streak in him, she doesn't.

So what do i do??? Sit on it and let him tell her? Or do it myself? It is none of my business as she is an adult, but you have to understand that she and i are very tight and she talks to me about everything and anything.

Loading...

hey sorry to hear that..i think you should tell her,inspite of waiting for the guy..and the way he msgd you i dont think hez interested in telling himself,dat was a gutless act!!how can someone just walkaway like that??
the sooner the better,and the good thing is you both are very close m sure you are going to handel it very well...
your daughter is very sweet and defintly deserves a better guy.
take care,do tell mekno wat you thinking to do!!
Reply

Loading...

I'm going to go against convention here and then explain why. I would not actually tell your daughter that her boyfriend is cheating. Even though you're her mom, here's why:

-if you're somehow wrong (and you're probably not), she will be furious and not talk to you and side with her boyfriend
-if you're right (and you probably are), she will be furious and not believe you and side with her boyfriend
-if you're right (and again, you probably are) she may break up with her boyfriend...but then they could get back together and blame you for trying to break them up

The only other scenario is that you're right and she'll break up with him for good. But that's rare. I'll leave it up to you. But I wouldn't say anything, even though it would probably eat me up inside... What do you think?
Reply

Loading...

I agree healthnfitnessguy. She came home from the b-day party totally devestated. She told that she was havin problems with "J"and i acted like i was none the wiser. She sat in her room and i could hear her sobbing. A bit later he showed up in our driveway and she bounded out of the house saying that they were going down to the beach to talk. I just shook my head to myself. She yelled thru the window that "J" would be coming back to the house after and please leave the garage light on. Ok, this happens all the time. About 3 hours later i heard his "trusty rusty" pull into the drive, she got out and he backed out and took off. She came directly into the house, stopped at the fridge for a soda then proceeded straight into her cave. I haven't seen her since, tho i heard the shower earlier.

Now today being Sunday, she is in charge of a wedding shower for her bff, which she should be up and adam for by now.
This kid wants to go out and experience being a young man, i realize this. My daughter is the only women he has ever been with, he is 19 and really should be able to see what life is all about. She speaks of marraige and babies, he speaks of hot cars and drag races and hanging with his boys. She is nurturing and loyal, has a magnetic personality and adores children, he seems scattered and one sided and would rather swing a wrench to soup up a car other than hang out and watch a movie. She wants solidarity and sedate, he wants wild and crazy.
I honestly would encourage him to get out and taste life a little bit. I am not saying that he should jump on every girl he sees, but being with the same one and only since the age of 15, he wants to see what he may have missed.
Now on the flip side of all that, i know people who have started out as high school sweethearts, got married fresh out of school and are still together into their 50"s, it does happen.
I know she is sad, but this is life. She will be 21 in a few weeks and she seems to think that her bio clock is ticking away and she is destined to live a lonely sheltered life in a rented trailer with 20 cats!!! Does she have a lot to learn.
Reply

Loading...

I think acting none the wiser was the best. I don't think I'd even mention that I knew anything even after she tells you. I dunno, I have this theory that being in a relationship that young can really mess with your sense of identity which is probably where she gets this notion that she's going to be single for life. She'll surely be better off after she's single again. Here's hoping for her!! What do you think of my theory?
Reply

Loading...

Ya, i think your right on. She loves, loves, loves baby's, period. She absolutley spoils and fawns over my grandson, her nephew, Christian.
She also works full time at the Day Care and is half way to her Associates Degee for Early Chilhood Education. She is an beautiful girl with a wonderful warm heart. She treats me, her mama, like a Queen. She was the one who took me the Lucy/Desi Museum for mothers day paid for our plane tickets and hotel for our vegas adventure, tho it's supposed to be her birthday trip, she says it's for me too.

She went grocery shopping with me today and she sat in the passenger seat texting bf (Ex) i looked over and saw a tear roll down below her sunglasses and as she closed the flap to her cell phone she said, "we're officially broke up" I didn't say a word. She wanted a vanilla caramel ice cap from Gloria Jeans, which is about a half hour from home, but i took her anyway. She looked so lost and iced capuccino always makes a bad situation look better. So we schlepped all the way to the mall on the other side of town. They were sooo good, especially on a 90 degree day like today. We usually split a large as they are so filling, but we were big girls and each had our own.
We got on the merry go round thats in the mall and just slurped our drinks and watched the people run around the mall. We started to guess something about each person we saw, like, i bet he has no kids, or i bet she cheats on her bf or, i bet her boobs are fake, oh geez, her toenail polish doesn't match her finger nails.

Now she sits in her room, it's okay, we have all been there at one point. It's a learning curve for sure and she will be stronger for it, maybe not today or tomorrow, but she will.
Reply

Loading...

OH good, I am so glad to hear that she's broken up with the jerk. I really don't know too many relationships that survive past high school for all that long anyway. I hope that she's able to handle it, but I'm sure she will. Just be there for her and be her mom and she'll weather it just fine.

You love I Love Lucy? I didn't even know that there was a museum!! Sorry to derail the thread :-)
Reply

Loading...

I don't mean to de rail the thread either but, yes i am a die hard Lucy mega fan. The Lucy/Desi Museum is in Jamestown NY, about 2 hours west from where i live. In fact i have several dolls of her and there are 2 that are worth over 500 bucks a piece, i refuse to sell my treasures tho.
Reply

Loading...

That's so neat! I had a friend who owned every last episode on VHS. He actually went through all the expense to buy them back when you could only get 4 episodes max on VHS so he had an entire wall full of them. Okay sorry. I've derailed your thread badly. :)
Reply

Loading...

Oooops %-)
Reply

Loading...