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Hi There im just asking for some advice on just what i should do ? Well my ex girlfriend i split up with me 3 weeks back she has being diagnosed with bipolar which has come to a shock because she was such a lovley sweet caring lass with a great personality and out of the blue she dosnt want to be with me. Anyways if you take your time to read my story on it all i just wonder if someone is willing to give me advice on what i should do.Going back to july last year i met this amazing girl shes 18 and im 20 she had a boyfriend so at the time we was just friends as you do, but overtime we got closer and closer and had a very strong bond she eventually came to mine one night and we slept together that led her to leaving him a few weeks down the line as it kept happening. She did love her ex very much and sometimes felt guity she told me this because i would ask her, there wasnt anything we couldnt talk about we helped each other out with alot and discussed alot of things in life. They were at a point of not getting along so well, always arguing and when she went to his to see him he would sit on his xbox all day, she used to speak with me on facebook whilst she was at his because she was board of him we would speak for abosloutly ages and eventually she gave me her number to text her she began falling out of love with him. When she met me she much preferred my personality we used to talk for hours about it i and every thing else under the sun, I made sure that she was happy with her decision to leave him for me and that she wasn't going to use me for a rebound or anything and she told me its defiantly what she wanted and that i made her very happy and she preferred it because id pay full attention to her and treat her well and the fact i was like her best friend.It was a long relationship of 3 years like but she was happy with me she completely phased him out. She would ring me at random times of the day always text me saying that shes missed me, always wanting to see me, asking me to come see her at work. Things were great we got together end of september and like all new couples we spent pretty much everyday with each other we was very close and it stayed like this for a fair while.We spoke about our future and that she can see me in it she thought about me every hour of the day she couldn't help it, it actually annoyed her sometimes because i was on her mind and she was busy. We always did something together and with friends we would go to pub, for a meal cinema have romantic nights in ect. Had alot in common aswell even shared the same birthday which was mad, we both went to a nightclub together for her 18 th and my 20th with all our mates and danced all night. There wasnt alot we disagreed on or didnt like. She told all her mates she can see this lasting and that she has never been so happy before always telling me she loves me to my face always smiling always happy. Used to go in a mood if she had to leave my house for work or her mam would ask her to come home. Come 1st of febuary it all crashed, so yeah its only been about 4 months and abit that weve been together but it was by far the best relationship ive ever had never felt a bond as strong as we had before with anyone, id let it go if i didnt and just move on but i really thought she was the one. When we first got together she had just started her new year at college for uni so she was loaded with coursework but she coped well, her parents used to give her grief about leaving her ex boyfriend for me but eventually came to terms when she had a talk with them about it, she always turned lads down when she was clubbing as most of my mates went to the same clubs and told me this, so the relationship was going great. This is were it gets bad her Grandad sexually abused her as a young child so she randomly gets memories of this happening, shes been through alot with it, she told me this way before we got together and i made sure i made her happy to the best of my ability. Now on the 29th of january we made our relationship official on facebook, With that her ex whent crazy her mam and dad had a go at her for making him upset, but she finally sorted it out after spending the night doing it she told me " i will always be yours for as long as you want me i love you so much your worth everything weve been through to be together " so i was happy the next day she seemed fine, I met her in town and she was an emotional mess said she had been given more coursework and that she couldnt cope with the stress no more, said she feels like shes in a dream nothing seems real she said she dosnt love me no more dosnt know what she wants, needs to find herself, cant think properly, she was blankly staring at the floor and crying, never seen her like this ever before. Ever since then ive left her to her space she keeps in touch but is up and down and told me she had been diagnosed with bipolar? Some days she rings me like everything is normal and we actually have good laughs, she texts me somedays like normal, without the love included like it used to be :/ the other day she said to me "hey there :) just been thinking, were are you now ? which i replied to  im at my mates so she said oh it dosnt matter so i kept talking to her and she said i cant remeber what i was going to say but im dieing for sex right now i feel like a nun which i was baffled by she said thats all she wants, next day she was fine talking to me, rang me up we had a laugh and today she said i think its best we dont talk no more its not fair im leading you on" so im sat here thinking what the f*****g hell is going on?.

Ive researched alot into bipolar ever since she told me and it makes sense on how she is behaving but i dunno what to do ? i still love her to pieces but she dosnt feel the same way about me, said she sees life differently now, dosnt want a boyfriend shes always out clubbing dosnt talk to me no way like she did, dosnt discuss anything with me, ive gone from been her everything, "her rock" to what it feels like to me as been a stranger :/ i wonder if all the stress from her parents, ex boyfriend, her memories from her grandad, working 2 jobs and been given more coursework has caused a trigger and triggered the bipolar off ? will she come back to me eventually i have read they normally do once the phase has passed over.


Hi there,

It sounds like you have been through alot, so I feel your pain. I myself am currently trying to get over the break up with my girlfriend who I believe is bipolar or has something similar.

First off, although relationships sounds great, it doesnt feel like you had the most solid base to start off. Its never good to try start a relationship straight after another one, especially when she seems like her thoughts and behaviours will be erratic. If she suffers from depression, then she may feel alot of guilt for what she has done, potentially emphasized more by her condition.

Im not an expert on depression, but I feel like I am slowly learning how to deal with people who have Bi-polar and depression. Me and Ex split a month ago, and I am still heart broken. We were together 4 months, and in that time she told me she was the love of her life, wanted to be with me forever and we would go on to have kids and be together. Then over Xmas i saw her suddenly deteriate, and within a matter of 10 days, I went from being the best thing ever, to wanting nothing to do with me. I tried to hold it together over the 3 weeks, but she expalined she no longer had feelings for me and she just wants to be alone. I sit here wondering how it went wrong (she says I made her feel unwanted and not special and I didnt take her out with my mates) and why its like this. Its been 7 weeks she was diagnosed with depression and 4 since we properly split. I still love her more than anything, but I also know that there are alot of questions that will remain unanswered.

I have learnt to just leave her alone, give her space, and let her get her thoughts and emotions in check. Its a massive risk to take, honestly I dont think she will come back. She doesnt talk to me or 'want to give me hope'. I struggle with that after how much of a fuss she made of me. But I think, I am not her, I dont know how she thinks, I dont know how past relationships have affected her, I dont know how serious her illness is (first time diagnosis with depression, not getting to the bottom of her problems, only taking meds). I simply now have to view it as this is how she feels and I must get on with it.

Maybe not want you want to hear. Be strong, be there for her when she needs you, but also dont get your hopes up. It will be her decision and if she comes back then it will be fantastic, but it may happen again. Carefully consider how it impacts your mental health. I have never suffered from depression, but am getting counselling to get through this.



Wow totally sounds like Her n me except it was her step dad at 14yrs old she to is by polar. N I. Still love her very much. But love doesn't leave u all twist d inside.. maybe after u/ break it does hurt but if u r constantly. Worry d about her all year like I was and u 'll be totally distract d bout urgently own life n family like me. 'm. I am way over forty. When I found out about bipolar disorder. 'm personality disorders n. I fell for her hard....n I want to help her so bad but I m. Not gonna be so distracted I walk out in front of a car .. DR worry myself sick so I had to step. LoL run away. N get her out of my mind.. If she wants u. N gets feeling better. She 'll come to u... or u will meet a nice young girl fall in love n have a baby girl to raise n dress up.. lol. Or turn into,a Tom boy lol. But find joy in,if life. Don't. Worry if life away. Joy. Joy. Joy. Maybe. The Lord will give u a baby boy... or. Just be single. But find joy. N. Realize the woman u fall for May want a boy. . L o L take care of ur. gentle mind n don't get sick... n you will be ok. N I hope thishelps.....


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