I can't grief

hi paige i'm so sorry for your double loss. i feel that you haven't gotten over the loss of your cousin it takes time and is different for everyone. i believe you are grieving for your nan in a way but you just don't feel it the way you expected. you may be numbed by another loss. i know this as i've had 3 losses in the last 5 years. i can only say try not to be too hard on yourself grief will usually happen in its own way and time. in my experience if you try to force it or try to make it go away you'll end up very ill and burned out from emotional exhaustion. do you have someone to talk to? that can help. for me personally i finally accepted that grief was gonna happen in its own way and can be different for each loss. my mistake was thinking it would be the same for each loss. believe me i think you are grieving but just not in the way you were expecting. i wish you well and hope your grief gets easier to handle with time.