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Hi im new to this and I wanted to give it a try since I have nobody to talk to about this or anything idk maybe someone out there can help me or give advice or just makes me feel better about myself. So I'm a girl that's 27 years old and I'm still a virgin i recently started trying to have sex for the first time and I've been trying for a week already and I don't know maybe is me maybe I'm broken or I'm the one with the problem but I'll get so nervous and start worrying and don't get me started with the pain I'm suffering with the pain I can only take it in at a certain level once he start going in more I'll get this really bad pain could that be the hymen or I don't know could it be that I'm too tight that I try to take it but I just can't the pain is too much and I push him off and I don't know what's wrong with me I've been using lube and most time he will give me oral before anything and I'll have an orgasm but it still hurt and I don't know how to do it anymore maybe I'm not turn on enough or I'm thinking too much about the pain or that I know is going to hurt or maybe I'm not 100% ready yet can anyone please help me and give some answers or advice thank you.

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Health Ace
6523 posts

Hey there first off I would say if you are not ready then he needs to respect that and not push you.  You say you get an orgasm with oral sex and if that's the case I don't know how you coined be more aroused.   Is your friend well endowed (how big is his penis)? Also have you bled at all during sex? Do you use tampons?

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Hey biomajor10 thank you for the response. He's penis size is about average I would say is not that big also no I haven't bled the couple of times we have tried it there hasn't been any type of bleeding and no I have never use tampons or gotten finger I'm a 100% virgin untouch could that be why it hurts so bad since nothing has gone inside ever?
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hey dayline 27i think your not being turned on enough ,enough to relax you
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Health Ace
6523 posts
Right definatly spend a lot of time with foreplay. It is common especially when new to tense up especially during penetration and that can lead to pain
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I suggest a few things you can try to help you enjoy sex more:
1.) Engage in more foreplay, have him get you very aroused before you attempt intercourse. (Oral sex, fingering you, even a small dildo or vibrator), this will help make sure you are nice and wet and lubricated.
2.) Have him use lubricant (KY Jelly or the like) or more lubricate if he already uses it, to help give you less discomfort and make his penis slide in and out with less friction.
3.) Once he is inside you, have him keep still and allow you to control the pace of movement. 4.) Try different positions to see if it more comfortable.
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