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im 20 years old and after ejaculation i can't ever seem to get itback up until 20 minutes or so later when the mood is gone. My girlfriend said "your young why can't it stay up', im thinking somethings wrong...

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All guys vary, seek medical advice if you need reassurance, Im no expert but Ive slept with 3 different guys and only 1 out of 3 was able to remain hard for several ejaculations, the other two would go and that would be it.

I reckon its normal, it just varies with some guys and the two that lost erection after ejaculation were aged 21 and 28 :$ the guy who stayed hard for a bit was 22 but he'd go and go floppy but if I wanted him again he'd come back up on demand.

If your having trouble satisfiying your girlfriend role play heaps and rub her sweet spots till she nearly climaxes, take your time with it, then go in for kill with your crew and hopefully she'll be happy once you go, if not get a dildo ;-)
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lackofpleasure -

I like your approach. You sound pretty resourceful for somebody with relatively little experience. Keep it up, girl! ;-)

jonathon -

There is something called a "refractory period" after orgasm during which you can't achieve an erection. Apparently your body has a little maintenance work to do before you're armed and ready for action again. If you're anything like me--and why wouldn't you be--you will find that this time varies from time to time depending on how excited you are, how well rested you are, how excited she is, and who-the-heck-knows-why. Sometimes you're going to be down for the full count, and sometimes you're going to really surprise yourself.

I'll never forget the first time I got hard again right away. I hadn't even withdrawn. I was having a great time with a great girl, our first time together. I was as surprised by it as she was, but of course I pretended it happened all the time, and after that it did seem to happen more often, especially when I was with a girl for the first time.

So don't assume that you have anything wrong with you. It's more likely that your girlfriend doesn't excite you enough. If you're getting enough sleep, eating a healthy diet and taking care of yourself, you're doing your part. If she wants another go 'round, maybe she needs to step up and do her part. You'd be amazed how much faster you can get an erection when a girl is going down on you or rubbing her breasts all over your body. And if you have a little time to kill, maybe you can go down on her for a while, or break out some sex toys. That ought to hold her interest. ;-)
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Ey, you responses are great and all but how do you maintain the mood. If you wait for twenty minutes or so. Then the mood is lost already
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Cialis (Tadalafil) is a medicine for the treatment of erectile dysfunction (ED). Cialis is used to increase the flow of blood to the penis during sexual activity. Cialis helps men to get and keep an erection for long time. Cialis tablets works for up to 36 hours. Cialis relaxes muscle and increases blood flow into the penis during sexual activity.


**edited by moderator**
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Thats normal. I doubt many guys can get straight back up!
I just wish my girl friend would want it twice! you've got it awesome!
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yeah i got this problem to but sometimes it stays up. most of the time its when we dont have time. ill tell u one method thats guarenteed though. if your like me then it takes longer for me to ejaculate when she is on top and quicker for her. my method is let her ride me on top and she has her orgasm first then i get on top and finish. somehow i went 2 hours non stop without ejaculating once and giving her multiple. that was also the time we had to stop a few minutes cuz she was about to have an asthma attack.
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I'm in the same boat as you one shot and mr.happy goes byebye. :'(
I've been told that you can train yourself to get it up quicker, tried it didn't work for me, you should give it a shot.
Apparently your just supposed to take one day a week and donate that day and cum as many times as you possibly can, and over time it is supposed to get easier for mr.happy to wake up :-D.
Like i said it didn't work for me but i was able to last a bit longer in bed
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most guys ned time to 'recharge',,,10minutes//30 minutes

Ive had time where I can go again in 5 minutes
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seriously this doesnt help this topic at all its just a plug for a drug.
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So far all replies I have read here strike a chord of truth. The thing is: pleasure differs per person. Staying in the mood for twenty minutes is very much possible, if both of you work to maintain it. Going down on her (with or without aid) can easily 'kill some time' without ruining anyones urges. But other factors described here are equally valid. I've had times where it would take hours for me to get back upto full steam, but since I've been training by simply masturbating as many times as possible during one day, I have noticed that I do already have some more control over whether or not I'll get hard again. The trick after that, however, is staying hard until your next orgasm. This is again where your partner comes in. If she (or he) knows what to do, knows what you like and knows how to keep you aroused during your little 'intermission', it'll be a lot easier to get back into action quicker. I have once made love to a girl for nine hours straight, giving both of us multiple orgasms. Obviously this wasn't nonstop hardcore action as that would probably have killed us, but by keeping the mood, and knowing how to keep the other aroused, we managed to go all night. This is however something you will need to discuss with your partner if it's a serious relationship you're trying to improve upon. Talking with eachother about your likes and dislikes will greatly affect your time between the sheets.

 

If all else fails, I DO in fact have experience with Cialis, and yes it does work great. However, it's bloody expensive and is still no complete guarantee of success. Although it greatly stimulates the erection process, actually being able to keep it up and even orgasm again will still depend greatly on your health, your experience and everything mentioned above.

 

In my opinion, if you both know from eachother what you like, there rarely is a need for a 'round 2', as long as both of you know how to make the other happy in bed. And yes, maybe sometimes you will want to try for a bit more, but it's a process that takes effort on both parts and I wouldn't recommend it for, let's say, a one-night stand. If you learn to aquire all the other skills there are to make your partner happy, I highly doubt you will ever truly need to get right back in the saddle, but nevertheless, if you can train both of you to attain it, then all the more power to you!

 

I hope my experiences can help you resolve this matter, even if it's just in your head. I wish you all the best of luck in your sexual endeavours.

 

Seph

 

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Me and my boyfriend have that same problem after he cums once he can't again, he's only 20 and I thought he was having a problem with the sex like maybe I was doing something wrong because he would cum once and then try again and he wasn't able to get a boner much like he was hard but yet still soft. is it just a guy thing?

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@no name

It is not 'just' a guy thing per sé, there are women who experience the same sort of feelings and the same kind of what they perceive as failure, but it does seem to strike men more often than women. There is a great deal of Anime in which the males get aroused many times over, which seems to suggest it is in fact something a lot of people fantasize about. If it were actually happening a lot in real life, I doubt many people would need or hang on to those fantasies.

Rest assured that it is NOT your fault. Wether or not you are doing things right or wrong is something I cannot tell you; only he can. However, I can tell you that the two of you manage to reach his first orgasm, and I can guarantee that wouldn't happen if he didn't enjoy it. This becomes even clearer due to the fact that he does get hard again, just not fully. In my own experience that means that he is still very much aroused, and his mind is set on going for another round, but his body just cannot (yet) keep up with what you're both asking of it. Like I have said in my previous reply: This is something you can both work through together. Since he is still aroused and wants to continue the pleasure for the both of you, it does mean that he might be able to if you both focus on maintaining the mood, rather than maintaining the erection. Find stuff you both like to do inbetween, to help the two of you stay aroused, but still giving his body the time it needs to recuperate. Whatever works for the two of you is down to your own (sexual) preferences and is not something I can fill in for you, but suggestions would be oral sex (either giving, receiving or both), manual stimulation while maintaining another form of contact, like kissing, massaging, etc., and pretty much everything the two of you would normally do as foreplay to get you both in the mood. Foreplay can quite easily be used as 'intermission play' as it were. After all, there's a good reason people often have/use it before starting to work towards their first orgasm.

Things like this are only a problem if you make it one in your mind. Remember that. It sounds to me like he's willing to give you more 'bang for your buck' as it were, and you should be appreciative of that in its own right. You are posting about it online, looking for people to help you out, which tells me you either love him and are doing this for him, or you feel unsatisfied with your current (sexual) relationship. If it's the former: all the more happiness to you. But realize that he might not even need to get an erection a second time if both of you are already satisfied after the first, and that you have the power together to work towards getting this little 'extra' if you feel like the other person deserves it. If it's the latter, then this topic, or any other topic for that matter, will not help you. You will need to come to terms with your own desires and learn how to fulfil them yourself before you can ask another person to do it for you. In that case you have an underlying issue that you need to resolve, that no amount of orgasms, even from a fully pilled up pornstar, will help you with.

I hope I've been able to ease your mind a bit on this topic, and I wish the two of you all the best in your relationship together. At the end of the day we consider a lot of (negative) things our body does as a form of failure, when in actual fact it is nothing more than a form of nature. Strive towards being happy together and satisfied in a non-sexual way, and the rest will follow. Caring for and loving one another will allow you both to get a little more out of the things you do, but it must always start with love, not force. Merry christmas to you all, as well as a happy, healthy and humping new year!

 

Seph

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I recently started having sex with a new partner, he told me he takes Viagra on occasion, But we have only had sex 3 times, the 1st time he came pretty quick, prob about 10 mins, 2nd time was a little longer maybe 20 mins, but this last time he only lasted 4 mins, I asked if he had been taking his Viagra and he said no, he didn't think he needed it with me..FYI ( He has a girlfriend, we started talking, and been taliking for 5 months) we get together whenever possible. I'm not looking for a realationship, just a safe sex partner, and he is that. I just wish he could last longer, I don't know if its his excitement of being with me or just a problem. I told him next time that I demand he takes his viagra! He has no problem getting hard, its just cumming pretty fast and not being able to get hard again in our time allowed. :(  Do guys who normally take Viagra do this? And if so..is there anything I can do to help, if he doesn't take it?

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Viagra doesn't make you cum quick at all, it takes like an hour almost to cum when I took it, cause your so f*****g hard
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