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I have had anal sex in the past, and have had hemorrhoids as well(But not within the last 9 months). I have what can only be described as a blown-out appearance at the top of my anus that is always there but causes no discomfort. I have tried various hem. creams, topical natural ointment(witch hazel, calendula, etc.), kegel-like exercises. Nothing seems to help. Anyone experience anything like this? Have a name for it? Another possible remedy?

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Yes! That sounds exactly like what ive been trying to figure out for myself, rather than being a cylindrical opening the anus is like a ring of bumps
No idea what it is, never gotten it checked out as its been that way my whole life and embarasing, but my mother told me she did when i was a small child and the doctors thought nothing of it if that helps
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