My youngest daughter just informed me that she is looking at apartments o.O
She said she wanted to talk to me first to get my input and has not turned in the application...yet.
I put on a brave face but couldn't sleep last nite. She will be 21 in September, i know, i know, but i am having a real hard time just thinking about it. She has a fairly good job and does on line computer classes in hopes of owning her own Day Care someday. Her bf of 3 years is going in with her. AAArrrggghhh. She says she wants to take their relationship to the next level, whatever %-) He also has a job. My heart hurts but i know i have to let her go. 21 is old these days for a kid to still live at home, all her friends have been out since 18 or 19. My 19 year old son just moved out last month and lives with 3 roomies. I see him all the time and he just so happens to be in the neighborhood when he has a basket of laundry with him, which is fine with me. My other 3 kids are on their own, but they are also in their late twenties and early 30's.
Can anyone tell me how to let go of her. She is a beauty and is so respectful of me. She is kind and loving and treats me like i'm a queen. It's not the treatement that she shows me that i will miss, she will always love me, it's her presence in the house. I'll miss seeing her every morning and having coffee with her before she leaves for work.
Okay, now i'm really upset. :'( :'( :'( :'(
She said she wanted to talk to me first to get my input and has not turned in the application...yet.
I put on a brave face but couldn't sleep last nite. She will be 21 in September, i know, i know, but i am having a real hard time just thinking about it. She has a fairly good job and does on line computer classes in hopes of owning her own Day Care someday. Her bf of 3 years is going in with her. AAArrrggghhh. She says she wants to take their relationship to the next level, whatever %-) He also has a job. My heart hurts but i know i have to let her go. 21 is old these days for a kid to still live at home, all her friends have been out since 18 or 19. My 19 year old son just moved out last month and lives with 3 roomies. I see him all the time and he just so happens to be in the neighborhood when he has a basket of laundry with him, which is fine with me. My other 3 kids are on their own, but they are also in their late twenties and early 30's.
Can anyone tell me how to let go of her. She is a beauty and is so respectful of me. She is kind and loving and treats me like i'm a queen. It's not the treatement that she shows me that i will miss, she will always love me, it's her presence in the house. I'll miss seeing her every morning and having coffee with her before she leaves for work.
Okay, now i'm really upset. :'( :'( :'( :'(
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You're going to have to let her go off and make some mistakes. It sounds to me like you don't approve of the boyfriend situation which is totally understandable. After all, she's 21 and already moving in with a guy! But you can be there for her and let her know that she can always come back to visit. What will help you transition is getting a pet or a hobby to help fill your time. That's what my mom ended up doing when I left. Be strong! You can deal with it. :-)
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I like her bf, but i like him better when they are not contemplating living together. 21 and already moving in with a guy is no big deal these days, heck i moved in with my bf when i was 18. The "do as i say, not as i do" cliche doesn't fit here. I have already made it clear that her room will always be here for her and she is welcome anytime, in fact she still will have a house key.
As far as a transition....yikes, i am so busy now already. I work full time in our office as it is. On top of that, i co-chair a chapter for abused dogs, i do the paperwork end of it. I also have our grandson 2 nights a week, (my choice) So, i am very busy, it's just that out of all the kids, she has been the closest to me. It's gonna feel like something is missing, tho she is basically around the corner. I know i'll thru it, in time. I think i'll even miss that stuff she plays on her stereo that vibrates thru the house. Black Eyed Peas has suddenly turned into one of my favorite groups... Boom Boom Boom, Gotta Git Get, love that song!!!!
As far as a transition....yikes, i am so busy now already. I work full time in our office as it is. On top of that, i co-chair a chapter for abused dogs, i do the paperwork end of it. I also have our grandson 2 nights a week, (my choice) So, i am very busy, it's just that out of all the kids, she has been the closest to me. It's gonna feel like something is missing, tho she is basically around the corner. I know i'll thru it, in time. I think i'll even miss that stuff she plays on her stereo that vibrates thru the house. Black Eyed Peas has suddenly turned into one of my favorite groups... Boom Boom Boom, Gotta Git Get, love that song!!!!
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Well it is always hard to let your child leave the house. BU you have to look it from the positive side. She is growing older and she is becoming an adult that is taking care for her self now. You maid it clear for here that she always has a place to come back, and that is very reassuring for person. As you said she is not moving to far, and you will be seeing her many times a week. Maybe you should organize few lunches or dinners together with them. See how their are doing and do they need any help. I think you need to be supportive for her.
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