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My wife and I found out that she is pregnat a month before we got married. We are both thrilled. On our honeymoon I got her off with my hand. Unfotantly this gave her cramps for days. She has lost all sex drive even the want to cuddle. She tells me that feels so many new feelings and she reads the books and this will go away. I have not been able to make love with my wife since we got married and that is bugging me alot. The pregnacy makes me very turned on and as she shows more and more I want her more and more. She tells me that she is fusstrated too but it hurts. Is there anything I can do? am I beign unreasonable to feel this way? I love her and the baby inside her so much I want this marrage to be all it can be.... help


Hi There,

You sound like a loving husband. As I am not sure how far along your wife is it is hard to tell what her body is going through at the moment. For some women, sex drive is either really existent or no-existent. The insurgance of hormones for a pregnant woman literally controls her body, sex drive included. As well, besides a lack of sex drive, some women may feel nervous as they feel they may hurt the growing baby. This is a common fear and if the pregnancy is not high risk, a doctor will be able to assure you and your wife in concerns to intercourse.
Frustration on your part is also normal and I'm sure you've taken into consideration her changing body. Things like disconformt, nausea or feeling, fatigue, weight gain, hormone fluctuations, muscle aches and cramping due to an ever enlarging uterus, food aversions etc, are all par for the course and not easy. Just think that in 9 months you and your wife will have a baby, definetly worth the wait!
May I also suggest finding ways for each of you to enjoy being intimate without intercourse? As a side note, not cuddling and aversion to sex was how my husband and I figured out we were pregnant. It did last quite a while. Women do not love thier spouses any less, but just give us and our bodies adequate to to adjust to our hormones, etc...