questions about the hymen

I used to think that the hymen was easily visible and that I could tell just by looking in a mirror weather or not mine was in tact or, for that matter, if I indeed even had one. (Through reading this website I have learned that women can possibly be born without hymen or accidentally break them when they're young.) Could someone please explain to me if the hymen is something that is on the very outer area of the genitals or beyond what you could see by just looking in a mirror? Something else that may make this more accurate for me to understand would be the answer to the question, Can you still have a hymen if you are able to use a tampon? I am a virgin and wear tampons, that is why I ask. Also, is it possible that even if my hymen is broken or even non-existant that my genital area will accessively tear when I lose my verginity? Thank you for responding.