Stage Fright!!! Erectile Dysfunction

stagefright over a year ago

Im 18 years old and I need sumbody to help me...sometimes i have problems with erectile dysfunction. Im 5' 10 and athletic with no family history of this problem. I have determined that it is definitely not anything physical...its all in my head. I get for lack of a better term "stage fright". Meaning i have no problem getting or maintaining an erection during masturbation or in a casual setting with a girl. However when it comes time to get in bed...well not only sometimes can i not get an erection, but my erection will actually die. This doesnt happen all the time, its usually when i KNOW that sex is gonna happen or its my first time with someone. I know the exact event that triggered this as well. I was about 15 or 16, my first sexual experience with a girl. We were in bed and we were grinding, i had a raging erection and it was going good. I asked her if she wanted to do it, she said no she wasnt ready. We kept making out and grinding for bout thirty minutes, when she decided that she WAS ready...however by this time my ***edited by moderator*** ** inappropriate posting** was exhausted from being erect for so long. So i whipped it out and much to my dismay i couldnt get it up, naturally this was very awkward at such a young age. The girl never talked to me again, no matter how many times i tried to contact her and naturally this ruined my confidence from the get go. Now, when i get nervous my stomach clenches up and it feels like the entire lower half of my body is locked up. Often, i cant even get an erection with oral sex!!! I desperately need somebody's help because i dont want to take viagra or turned on goat weed to feel confident in my penis. Please, please, please, somebody tell me something...

P.S.- I also have difficulty with wearing condoms...it seems like as soon as i even think about putting one on i go limp. Does this have to do with the previous problem or is it something different??

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Guest over a year ago

Oh my I can imagine how horriffying that experience must have been for you..As a trainee Clinical Psychologist I would suggest talking to someone to work through the stages you went through as a 15 year old and how they still affect you..As you have mentioned it mustn't be something physical however talking through your feelings,exploring them,gaining a new perspective and long term confidence on the matter can result from seeking some help from a qualified Psychologist.This is not I hope you understand me telling you that "you need help" this is me suggesting a way which will help you gain and not lose :)
p.s. I doubt that not being able to maintain an erection whilst putting on a condom is anything different, it is your mind realising that since you have put that condom on, now you MUST maintain the erection which is what causes you to lose it.

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Guest over a year ago

I also do believe that you should try to find someone who you can talk to because I am aware how this can affect you when this happens to you when you are young. It can be because of so many different things, and one of those things can be a really often masturbation. I also agree that you should talk to physiologist because, generally, this all is in your head. For example, a lot of young boys have this pressure in their heads and they are really obsessed with a fact will they be able to have intercourse, will they fail, etc. Also, I suggest trying to seek a natural treatment for erectile dysfunction. There are so many of those medications that can help you before you try some other medications or way of the treatments. Good luck!

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