ways of stimulating my anus at home , by miself

Use a rocking chair. Either back up to it or put it next to the bed. Attach a toy to the front and use your legs to move it.

Get creative.

Either online or at your neighborhood adult book store purchase an appropiate dildo/vibrator that has both a vibration option and a suction cup at the end. Find a surface tall enough so that you can anchor the dildo/vibe to it. This will allow you the height to lower yourself onto the dildo/vibe as slowly as posible. Once you are used to and comfortable with the girth and length, you can "ride" the dildo/vibe to your hearts content. Online a 8" dildo/vibe is about $40. In an adult store they more expensive: +$50. Give it a try and see what you think. I started off with a medium size dildo/vibe about 6" in lenth. I went up to a monster that was 10" in length. The monster was too uncomfortable and dangerous so I backed off to the 8" size. You also may purchase a variety of dildo/vibes depending on resources.

When I do anal master nation I use a large crocheting needle. The round end not the curved! It's a great tool.

I have anal sex and I use lubricants, I take it in slowly and easily but it still hurts!!!! Now what????