It's took a lot for me to write this.
Around 6 months ago myself and my partner wanted to try having a baby so I came off the pill, I went to my doctors and they said it was fine to do so. Never warned me of any problems I may have.
Since being off the pill, I have suffered terribly with panic attacks and anxiety attacks. I'm miserable. I hate myself for feeling like this. I feel
I always use to be a happy person, out and about, full of energy and spirit. But now, there not a second I don't want to cry, or curl up in a ball and shut myself away. My heart racing to the point I'm convinced that I will have a heart attack and die. I get hot within seconds, feel faint and dizzy. I worry it will happen when I'm alone and no one will find me, I will worry it will happen when I'm at work or around people and they won't know what to do and I will embarrass myself. I'm scared to do anything now.
Getting out of bed is difficult, I hate seeing friends and now even family, my relationship is suffering and how I feel about myself is at it's lowest. I cry, so often, I cry just thinking about how I feel. How scared I am. I miss who I use to be. I use to smile when now, all I have is tears down my face and a panic deep inside me that I can't control.
The doctors gave me medication, which I don't want to take, they said it can be addictive and it can make having a baby harder. Why would I take them if this is what happens?
I feel like I'm never going to be normal again. I try to explain this to people and no one understands, how can they when I don't even understand myself.
I dread everyday. I don't eat hardly anymore, Iv gone off food I use to love and I'm pushing everyone away. It's ruining my life.
Iv read online that once having a baby that my hormones can even themselves out and I will feel better. But I'm in no fit mind or place to have a baby right now. I don't know why this is happening to me.
Was being on the pill for all these years worth it? What is in them?? So badly to make my body react like this. Please help me.
I need help