Baby Fever but Husband doesn't want kids... He gets along with older kids, but not with infants

Hi, guest.

The desire to have children and differing views on parenthood can be a significant issue in a relationship. Here are some steps and considerations that might help you navigate this:

Open Communication: It's crucial to have an open, honest, and non-confrontational conversation about this topic. Choose a calm and comfortable time to discuss your feelings and desires regarding having children. It's important to listen to his concerns and fears as well.
Understanding His Perspective: Try to understand why your husband is hesitant about having children. Is it the responsibility of parenting, financial concerns, lifestyle changes, or something else? If he is particularly uncomfortable around infants, it could be a lack of confidence in handling young babies or fear of the unknown.
Seek Professional Guidance: Sometimes, conversations about such sensitive topics can benefit from the presence of a neutral third party, like a counselor or therapist. They can help facilitate communication, ensure both of your viewpoints are heard, and assist in finding common ground or resolution.
Explore Compromises and Solutions: If his fear is specifically about infants, discussing ways to prepare for and manage that stage might be helpful. This could include parenting classes, spending time with friends who have babies, or reading about infant care.
Acknowledge His Strengths: Share with him the qualities you see in him that would make him a good father. However, be cautious not to push the narrative of him being a good dad as a way to convince him to have children. It's more about building his confidence than persuading him.
Consider Future Implications: It's important to consider how you both will handle the situation if your views don't align. The decision to have children is a major one and both partners need to be on board. If there's a fundamental disagreement, it's a significant issue that needs to be addressed thoughtfully and respectfully.
Patience and Timing: Sometimes, people's views on having children can change over time. However, it's also possible that his views may remain the same. It's important to give each other space and time to think and feel about such a life-changing decision.

Remember, the decision to have children is a mutual one and requires both partners to be fully committed and comfortable with the idea. It’s crucial to respect each other’s feelings and viewpoints, and to find a path forward that works for both of you.