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I know that I most probably should get professional help, but at the moment that's not available to me, and for the past year I've been quite suspicious of my alternating moods. I always thought they were normal, until this year when I was under a lot of emotional stress. I seem to have lost control of all my emotions now.

A few months ago I was facing some family issues and was taken to a therapist. The therapist diagnosed me with Severe Depression as I had some suicidal tendencies and consulted me to get psychiatric help. I've been put on a waiting list for the psychiatric help. At that time I thought the depression was just a stage, but now about 5 months later, I find myself feeling worse than ever.

It's like... I can be extremely happy at one time, and then suddenly extremely resentful, angry and depressed. It's really exhausting and I find that now I'm starting to have more manic than happy moods. I find I pick fights with people around me, and one moment I can completely loving of them and the next I can feel this strong need to fight with them. Then I do fight and later find myself feeling really guilty.

I dont know if this is just normal moodyness associated with my age (eighteen) or an actual disorder. Do you guys know how I might be able to better tell?

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calamity

symptoms of bipolar

alternating patter of emotional highs and lows. The intensity of the signs and symptoms vary. It may range from a mild condition to a sever condition. There maybe periods of normal behavior

periods of extreme optimism and inflated self-esteem
rapid speec, racing thoughts and agitations and increased physical activity.
poor judgement
recklessness or taking chances not normally taken
difficulty sleeping
tendency to be easily distracted
inability to concentrate
aggressive behavior.

feelings of sadness, anxiety, guilt, or hepelessness
disturbances in sleep an appetite
fatigue and loss of interest in daily activities
problems concentrating
irritability
chronic pain without a known cause
recurring thoughs of suicide
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try getting more sleep
quit caffeine and chocolate
no decongestants
absolutely no alcohol
breathe deeply, often

see if it helps...

write down your feelings, goals, aspirations, regrets, etc.

It's time to plan your future!
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