Is it weird that I get aroused while listening to my parents making love?

OK, it's not fair to make you wait on this one so I'm putting in a bit of a night shift. I noodled the net a bit (as you likely did) and it all seems to be aimed at parents with much younger kids who do not know what their parents are up to. Your 13 YO wanders which suggests that she can hear more from the landing than through the bedroom wall, despite having the futon right there. There must be a strong urge for her to do this (i.e. leave the room) due to the risk of being caught. But that seems to be a calculated risk she is prepared to take. So, perhaps the wall is not as hearable through. I think you have to take the tack that if she heard you (which you now know she did), you consider it accidental on her part as there is no point now in denying what you were doing but you do not want at this stage to confront her about purposefully listening in (very high burden of proof need). Perhaps you will have no option at a future date, but not know. That will make her feel much better in that her cover was not 100% blown (close call though), because her "silly" parents don't really know the real reason she was up and about at that late an hour.
"Honey, you know last night when I came down and saw you at the fridge?". Yes. "Well Daddy and I think you heard us in our bedroom when you got up". Almost guarantee she will say no. "Well we thought you must have because we definitely heard you leave your room and I'm sure we were louder than you. I'm very embarrassed to say this but we were making love when you got up. We do that because we love each other. All grownups do as you will find out when you are older". She will likely deny it again out of embarrassment but you have just made her realize that you can hear her leave her bedroom, even if you can't. "In the future we should all try our best not to disturb each other at night but I'm sure you know that what we do in our bedroom is very private and again we are very embarrassed and sorry that you might have accidentally heard us. When you are a grown woman and married like us I'm sure you will realize and appreciate that. Just so this doesn't happen again, we think it might be a good idea also for you to start sleeping in your own bed again because the futon is right next to our wall and well, sound travels". And then get rid of that futon - treat her to a new dresser on that wall or something. Also look for some smooth sound insulation to put on the divider wall in your room (Mummy and Daddy are renovating!). She will no doubt try listening in again, but if she really can't hear you properly from her bedroom and knows that you can hear her if she leaves her room then at least you have scored a tactical victory.

I find it interesting that you found her downstairs in the kitchen. If she were really listening in, then wouldn't she have just gone back to her room when you were done? :/

At this point I feel it would be remiss of me not to clarify that I don't believe it were my parents themselves who were turning me on. At that age I had little knowledge of the physicalities of sex, other than the basics, and I can't recall ever visualising the act itself. For me it were the nature of the act that excited me so. Explicit, animalistic, taboo, hearing something I'm not supposed to be hearing. Whenever you try to hide something from a kid, they immediately want to know what it is you're trying to hide. Don't get me wrong, my mother was a very attractive woman in her own right, but I never thought of her that way. To me she were just mum. But therein lies the arousal. Being secretly privy to what mummy and daddy get up to when they don't think anybody else is around so they don't have to be mummy and daddy anymore. Have you been able to identify just what it is that lay at the core of your anxiety? Is it performance anxiety? The unease of knowing you are turning your own daughter on? Or is it just the confronting nature of the whole ordeal?

My husband actually thought he’d heard a noise, but I told him it was probably the cat and that the girls were asleep! I so wanted to believe it, and actually at the time think I truely did! When I got back upstairs I told my husband what she told me and that I believed she’d been listening and I think for the first time he actually believed me!! His reaction was ‘eugh why would she do that, we’re her parents!’ I told him I’d googled it and found it was fairly common, and that it wasn’t the fact it was us but just the sounds in general. He quickly just asked if we could change the subject. Although I always thought he completely understood where I was coming from (and think he does in terms of hearing sex in general), I think he personally may have just dismissed the idea of our eldest listening in, thinking it would have just grossed her out. Therefore he couldn’t see my logic in thinking she could have been purposefully listening in. Will be interesting to see what his attitude to sex will be now he fully understands how real it is.

Sorry, I didn’t even see this response, didn’t expect it just yet either lol. I’d told her she couldn’t sleep on the futon because she’d been complaining of back ache and I’d convinced her it was that! She’d spent most of yesterday on the trampoline so no doubt it was actually that, but didn’t want to miss the opportunity to get her back in the top bunk of her bed; futon folded back up into a chair and cover zipped back on. It actually squeaks very loudly when it’s like that too lol. They don’t sleep with the door completely closed because the handle is very noisy and wakes everyone up if one of them needs to pee in the night. So she knows I wouldn’t be able to hear her leave her room. I think if we were to start closing it, it would cause confusion with our youngest.

No because I think she would have been stood on the stairs rather than directly outside our door. If she was to stand half way down then she’d be perfectly aligned to my bedroom door. We have spindles so she’d have heard everything just as well from under our door since that still puts her only roughly 3 feet from it. Her dad left the room pretty much straight away to freshen up in the bathroom. He doesn’t usually, but it was quite warm last night. Therefore he probably startled her, and the only way of escape would have been down. The fact she stumbled on her words when I found her kind of said it all too.

I completely get that, I was the same, that’s why I explained it that way to my husband. It’s the unease of not wanting ‘our sounds’ to be turning her on, or anyone for that matter! I think I’d be the same if I found the neighbour was listening in! It’s such a personal ordeal, and I’d like it to stay that way. So because of that I’d get anxious knowing he’s going to want sex, but also knowing I may have an audience too.

Hi there, sorry to butt in, but I've just been reading through the comments and can't help sympathizing for your situation. I'm in a similar situation myself, with two boys, ten and four. The four year old is not a problem (yet) but we suspect our ten year old might be taking an interest in what goes bump in the night. We've heard footsteps outside our door and on one occasion hubby caught him in the hallway sneaking back to his room. We've resorted to shower sex for the past few weeks (aside from the occasional Sunday morning session) in the hopes the running water will provide me with some cover. It's also surprisingly erotic once you get the hang of it. Just a thought :)

You are aware he’s probably fully aware what you’re doing in there tho aren’t you? I, after nearly 20 years, agreed to have a tv in our room, in an attempt to provide some ‘cover’. What an expensive waste of time that was lol. I think if we were to start showering together all of a sudden (given that her dad prefers a bath), she’d be straight on it. Although if he was to get a ‘shower’ aka just turn it on. And I was going for a nap (which isn’t unusual), we could possibly get around it that way. Might be onto something there :)

I have the same issue with my 15 year old girl! yet this is the only real thing discussing the topic I’ve come across online! this has got to be a bigger issue than some anonnomus chat website? or do most parents just stop having sex all together once their children reach a certain age??? to all teens that come across this: WE KNOW!!!! if that fact doesn’t put you off listening in where you’re clearly unwanted, I don’t know what will smh. do you really wan to be the reason they split up??? give your parents the privacy they deserve in their own home and go put some headphones in and listen to some music!!!!

If you (the violated parent) posted that on another page, or I haven’t been so descriptive, I very well may have accidentally on purpose left my laptop on. I know it’s frustrating, but it happens. It’s just about getting around it until they’re big enough to move out. Kind of makes you wonder if parents are almost OK with their children listening in, or if they’re maybe oblivious to it. Who knows...

I can see where you're coming from. Mommy and daddy suddenly taking showers together could very well raise a red flag if that's out of the norm. However, if one were to take a shower while the other is already upstairs just having a nap, that might be a plausible way to get around it. For me, my husband always has a shower after work and so far I've found it easy enough to slip upstairs and join him without drawing too much attention. And even if Mr 10 knew, I doubt he'd be able to get away from Mr 4 long enough to listen in. We also do the afternoon nap thing, but usually when it's only Mr 4 in the house and he's having a nap himself. Sunday mornings is another option, with the kids knowing that's mommy and daddy's day for sleeping in and not to disturb us. They will be downstairs, happily glued to the TV watching their favorite cartoons. Nighttimes are the problem, though. I try to keep my mouth closed and not make too much noise, but that can be nigh on impossible when the big O comes! Even causing me to feel guilty afterwards, like it's my own fault our eldest son has started listening in. I'm definitely not OK with this and I know his father isn't either. I understand he's probably just curious, but the thought of him actually getting turned on and doing you-know-what as a result of my moaning is unnerving to say the least!

Going by what I've read online, other parents I've spoken with, and also my own personal experiences, I'd say most parents are probably more concerned with their kids walking in on them than they are about being heard. Not to say they would be OK with either scenario, but it's amazing the false sense of security a lock on the bedroom door can create. I also think it's probably easier for some parents to get caught up in the heat of the moment and perhaps they don't even realise just how loud they are. If you've never had reason to suspect you've been heard, it would be easy to assume the kids are asleep and you can get away with it. I never went out of my way to listen in on my parents, but I often heard them. My room was right next to my parents room, with nothing but a thin dividing wall in between. I would wake up to the sound of the bed creaking and my mum breathing heavily, moaning, gasping and panting, then kinda like a muffled squeal followed by whimpering that almost sounded like crying and mum's voice would be all shaky. It was very intense, and yes, I will admit I also found it intensely arousing. For years I felt conflicted about this, like maybe something was wrong with me and I were the only one. Now I know that's not true, and in fact, far more common than the "scarred for life" camp would have us believe.

No I get you’re not OK with it, just as we’re not. I was referring to those who you read of who say their parents laugh at them and tell them it’s only natural or something along them lines, and do nothing to avoid the situation. It obviously mustn’t be a big issue to the majority. Unless people are just too embarrassed to tell anyone they think their child is getting off to their sounds of lovemaking. Maybe not everybody is as open about the subject either. Even me I suppose! I tired to speak to a friend about it and she just told me I was being paranoid and that nobody would enjoy their folks at it. She obviously must have been one of those who didn’t.

I wonder if the “scarred for life” camp feel so against it because they too become aroused and it’s that confliction that scars them, not the act itself. Suppose we’ll never know.