My boyfriend and I are new to the whole "sex" thing. We have been trying to have sex for the past 3 years, but due to Vulvar Vestibulitis, it has been almost impossible. After trying different creams and injections, I was finally able to ease into sex with him, but only when I am on top, any other position hurts upon penetration.
Again, as I said, we have increasingly eased into it this week, until only pressure was felt during thrusting.
Let me preface my question by saying that I have been on birth control since I was about 12 for painful/excessive bleeding during periods and switched about 2 yrs ago to seasonale so that I only have a period every 3 mo. My boyfriend always urinates before intercourse is attempted and I always urinate after. While he was easing me into penetration, I found it very uncomfortable when he was wearing a condom and the first few times there was very little thrusting because I was just getting used to the feel of him and he did not wear a condom, but he did not orgasm, either.
Lately, as we have been able to be more adventurous and thrust more, initial penetration still hurts, so I have him enter me without a condom until I relax a little, then he pulls out and puts one on before we begin thrusting. We always use a water-based lube regardless if he has a condom on or not. We were BOTH virgins prior to this and we are both in our early 20's.
So, with that said, the time before last I was able to orgasm, but noticed that I was spotting brown blood for about an hour after, (very minor spotting, and only when I would wipe myself. It did not get on my underwear.) I KNOW this is not my hymen, because at 16, before I was diagnosed with Vulvar Vestibulitis, I had my hymen removed because dr.s thought that was the problem. About 4-5 hrs after intercourse I had cramps, very similar to mild menstrual cramps. I had not bled before this time, but again it may have been due to the increasing thrusting.
This last time I was not able to bring myself to orgasm and after 45 minutes my legs began to get tired so I rested for about 5 min. He got me excited, and used more lube, and then we tried again, but after about 15 more minutes, I began to feel burning so we stopped. That was about 9pm last night. This morning about 5am I woke up with slightly more severe, but still mild, cramps and I was not bleeding, but my vagina was itching. I took a shower in between and did not douche or use soap, but washed myself with water in that area.
My boyfriend has yet to orgasm from our sexual encounters. The thrusting is not enough yet for him to orgasm.
I should also mention that I get yearly pap smears, (even though they are extremely painful due to my Vulvar Vestibulitis and the dr has to numb me.) I have to in order to get my birth control. My last one came up normal and aside from problems in the vulva, there were no other problems with anything else. That was in April and was before beginning sex.
Can anyone PLEASE help me out here? Everything I am reading says that cramping means you are pregnant, and now I am paranoid, even though we are taking precautions!!
Are these cramps normal for someone new to sex? What can I do to make the cramps and itching go away? My Gyno is a specialist in vaginal pain, but is 3 hours away and I can't get in to see him until December.
Can anyone help me out in the mean time??
Again, as I said, we have increasingly eased into it this week, until only pressure was felt during thrusting.
Let me preface my question by saying that I have been on birth control since I was about 12 for painful/excessive bleeding during periods and switched about 2 yrs ago to seasonale so that I only have a period every 3 mo. My boyfriend always urinates before intercourse is attempted and I always urinate after. While he was easing me into penetration, I found it very uncomfortable when he was wearing a condom and the first few times there was very little thrusting because I was just getting used to the feel of him and he did not wear a condom, but he did not orgasm, either.
Lately, as we have been able to be more adventurous and thrust more, initial penetration still hurts, so I have him enter me without a condom until I relax a little, then he pulls out and puts one on before we begin thrusting. We always use a water-based lube regardless if he has a condom on or not. We were BOTH virgins prior to this and we are both in our early 20's.
So, with that said, the time before last I was able to orgasm, but noticed that I was spotting brown blood for about an hour after, (very minor spotting, and only when I would wipe myself. It did not get on my underwear.) I KNOW this is not my hymen, because at 16, before I was diagnosed with Vulvar Vestibulitis, I had my hymen removed because dr.s thought that was the problem. About 4-5 hrs after intercourse I had cramps, very similar to mild menstrual cramps. I had not bled before this time, but again it may have been due to the increasing thrusting.
This last time I was not able to bring myself to orgasm and after 45 minutes my legs began to get tired so I rested for about 5 min. He got me excited, and used more lube, and then we tried again, but after about 15 more minutes, I began to feel burning so we stopped. That was about 9pm last night. This morning about 5am I woke up with slightly more severe, but still mild, cramps and I was not bleeding, but my vagina was itching. I took a shower in between and did not douche or use soap, but washed myself with water in that area.
My boyfriend has yet to orgasm from our sexual encounters. The thrusting is not enough yet for him to orgasm.
I should also mention that I get yearly pap smears, (even though they are extremely painful due to my Vulvar Vestibulitis and the dr has to numb me.) I have to in order to get my birth control. My last one came up normal and aside from problems in the vulva, there were no other problems with anything else. That was in April and was before beginning sex.
Can anyone PLEASE help me out here? Everything I am reading says that cramping means you are pregnant, and now I am paranoid, even though we are taking precautions!!
Are these cramps normal for someone new to sex? What can I do to make the cramps and itching go away? My Gyno is a specialist in vaginal pain, but is 3 hours away and I can't get in to see him until December.
Can anyone help me out in the mean time??
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Your description seems to sound like both you and your partner have different expectations from sex. Talk things over, spend more time doing foreplay. If and when properly aroused the vagina is properly lubricated. Attempt sex at this level for maximum benefit. Or if you have a medical condition or lack of lube, use KY Jelly or other lubricants.
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I can honestly tell you that when i was diagnosed with clamydia thats the exact same thing i was experiancing. I no longer had it but with my luck i had it for 3 months and im convinced that i am no longer fertal cuz of that douche bag... anyways, you could have a vagnial yeast infection as well, or a UTI. Its very rare that you could get pregnant from pre cum but it does happen, i doubt you are though. just make an appt. with a doctor and make sure he does a THURO examination on you. we dont want nothing serious!
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