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Okay, I'm not sure what else to do.

But I think that my boyfriend's addicted to meth. I know he did try it once last month and he said, "just once, I won't get addicted." But we all know how that goes.

So, usually he's a quiet, somewhat reserved guy, impossible to irritate no matter what. Talks softly, and stays to himself for the most part. He's always had a kind of little pudge on his gut and his cheeks used to be a little chubby. We always play video games, cook together, and so fun stuff.

Lately, he's a lot louder. He's VERY quick to irritate, but he doesn't yell at me. He just talks really loud, and it's not like him, so it scares me. He's slimmed out very much, and his eyes constantly look tired. All he wants to do when he comes to my house is curl up on the floor and sleep, instead of going for a walk, playing video games or anything else. Plus, he never has money. Maybe that's not a big sign, but he always says, "sorry, I'm broke" or "I'm saving money for this weekend," and when I ask him what he's doing this weekend, he always answers with a quick "nothing" or "just hanging out with the gang."

And yesterday he asked me, "would you break up with me if like, you found out I've been doing meth for a month?"

That just broke my heart so we talked about it and he got very defensive. He said, "look, I'm not doing it, but honestly if I was I wouldn't tell you. That's something I'd just hide." So that got us no where. He's always confided me when he goes off to do LSD or anything like that so we trust each other but now I'm scared. But he denies it and he says he feels bad that I don't believe him or trust him about it. I have every reason not to. He clearly said he wouldn't tell me if he WAS doing meth, and with all the things I've observed in him, I'm suspicious.

Are there other tell-tale signs I should be looking for? Other little things I need to pay attention to? And if the evidence adds up, and I become sure hes on meth, what's the first step I need to do to help him?

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Other habits? Compulsive behaviors (brushing teeth too much, cleaning, cutting nails really really short) Tightening of the jaw, sometimes the lips may be bruised or cut due to biting/chewing etc.

Being paranoid at times, talks a lot, irritable, fatigued, either constipated or is experiencing LBM, loss of appetite and dehydration are also common.

I know this is hard and will sound really lame. But you have to support him. Let him know it's okay, youre disappointed or maybe a bit put off, but he needs to know that you'll still accept him.

When he mentions meth, dont react negatively. Meth really messes with the brain, so he may be hard to talk to.

He needs lots of fluid so that the drug will pass quicker :) Thats it! Just send me a msg if you have questions or just want to talk.


**edited by moderator**
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I have to disagree with the last post. Water? If only it were that easy.

I am 45 years old. My husband says he has done meth for the last 20 years. We have lost everything we own several times over now. He is on disability. Our house is in foreclosure. He has a felony drug possession record now, so he is unemployable now. He has spent most of the money I have earned over the course of our 23 year marriage on METH and I was too dumb to know it. We thought he was bipolar (who knows, maybe he is) so he has gone through all kinds of mental health counseling, meds, etc. Now I know it was probably just the meth. He seems to be off it now, ever since he got busted and is on probation for three years. I have my own bank account and only give him what he needs to buy minimal things through the week. Now he lays around the house all day and sleeps. He can't think straight and needs help with simple daily activities, like remembering to take a shower. Our kids have missed out on a normal father relationship. They are grown now, but they have witnesses all kinds of chaos and abusive behavior. All because of this.

I am not trying to tell you to ditch him, because I do believe in compassionate treatment of another human being, honoring commitments, etc. But, you have to be clear about your limits and how willing you are to let this encroach on your life... I would get help and counseling now, for yourself first. There should be free or low cost counseling through your county Mental Health Department, or they can refer you to a low cost agency.

If you don't seek help I am your future here to warn you. It has been lonely, heartbreaking, and shameful experience not wanting any of my coworkers and family members to know. I do love him but not in the way of a marriage partner. I am his caretaker.

Peace to you.....
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