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When my wife an I are getting along, I feel fine, motivated and cheerful. Once we have afight, I immediately lose all motivation, and feel very miserable, very down.

The thing is, I think she knows this and uses it against me!

Is this a sign of emotional dependency? If so, is there any literature I could study to help me with it?

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it's normal for people to feel down when they have a fight. All i can say is, don't let her see you hurting. if she knows you get down and uses it against you, thats what she is looking for, she expects it. you can also try some counciling.
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