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Got one of those out-of-the-blue calls a little while back from a buddy who's wife is filing for divorce. The first in my clutch of pals, so to speak. They have two boys the ages of my little guys, had been married 10 years, and went through some major financial disasters together, and when all looked to be smoothed out, they're hanging it up. Anyway, it seemed like one of those calls, not so much to let us know, but kind of like in addition to assets, friends get divided up too.
I'm sure nearly everyone has been through this, being on the outside looking in, and wanting to 'help' in some way, but knowing the decision was made and all we can do is 'be there',I wondered what other would do to help?

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Mainly just do what you do well.....be a sympathetic ear if he needs to talk. He's been a good friend to you over the years, obviously, and since we can never know all the nuances of someone else's life, it's not for us to judge or do anything but let them know we support them and want them to be happy. I have found that sometimes just listening is a very good way to show someone you care about them, even if they're not asking for advice per se.

And you're really good at that, ya know! ;)
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I got a similar call about a year ago from my only friend in Atlanta. He said, "You know that billboard on the highway with that lady divorce lawyer on it? What's her phone number?" and he was seriour.

I wasn't surprised at all that they divorced, they were both rather selfish. Too bad for their little boy though. He and I still talk sometimes, but he's never brought up the divorce issue.
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I only have one close friend who got divorced. Good thing, too. She was a bish. I didn't tell him that until after the divorce, but he has been much happier ever since.
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Well, especially if it's a "no-fault" situation, friends shouldn't get divided up like the china and silver. Try to be a friend to both parties if you can.
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"It's not like Hallmark makes "Happy Divorce" cards"

...yet.

I don't have any divorced friends, which is pretty statistically remarkable in these times.
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That could also be an excellent indicator that you don't have any friends. :P
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That could also be an excellent indicator that you don't have any friends. :P
HA! That was fubby!!! Statistically speaking, of course.
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A good friend of mine called me up out of the blue and says " Well I'm getting divorced."

I was kinda shocked but managed to say " Gee, I'm sorry to hear it."

And she says " Are you kidding!? I'm happy!!"

Me : "Well in that case CONGRATULATIONS!!!"
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really. what is the proper response to "I'm getting a divorce" ???
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thats a tough one. One I'm afraid I'll need to learn how to respond to since I don't see a few of my friends new marriages lasting.... :? :(
"How are you holding up?" maybe? :shrug:
edited for clarity...
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It's about freaking time? ;)
It really depends on the situation and whose friends are getting the news. When my then-best friend Laura got a divorce, we were all so relieved because her ex hubby was such a nasty b*stard that we sent her a dozen roses, balloons and a singing telegram to work! It was hilarious.....she loved it.
Someone else might not see things that way of course......
I'm with you, Pffff....I already have my response ready....another one bites the dust...NEXT!
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You've just been uninvited to my end of the summer party.
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I meant "only old friend from way-back". ;)
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I am waiting to hear more from more people my age. So far most of the people I know are still married.

One guy I used to work with is 33 years old and has already been married and divorced TWICE!!

wow.
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