I am clearly not the person I used to be! I an constantly knocked down and when I try to get up I am victim to another blow! I try so hard I an a disappointment to who ever I am around! I am a 21 virgin who is never been kissed and I feel that I have to lie to get people to like me, but of all my friends I still feel used and pathetic. The only two people that ever cared for me are now gone to heaven and sometimes I just wish I was with them! I try so hard to be strong I never amidted this to anyone cause I sick of getting dirt thrown at me! I just want people to understand my pain and help me cause I am sinking and it starting to hurt to breath. Sometime I just wish my heart would stop and I can just lie done forever!!