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Hi,

I seem to be getting more and more aggressive with people when I've had too much alcohol in me and it's beginning to get me in trouble with family and friends. I went around Town on Friday in broad daylight and started arguing with everyone I came accross. I just lost it completely and now I'm so ashamed and just waiting for the police to come calling to tell me I've assualted a couple or something. I shouldn't even be drinking in the first place because I'm an alcoholic, but I just can't stop and my behavior is so out of control. I also went into a lot of shops on Friday and verbally abused the people working in them. I'm so ashamed, the people in this town must think I'm after losing my mind. Solicitors, Doctors, Policemen, Priests, I'm after attacking them all. How can I ever correct this?

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Hi mate,

Im in the exact same position. I work in London for a good company and cant go out after work for drinks as i am a complete and utter liability! I was a bit of a wild child from the ages 13-18 and then i kinda matured a bit. The only thing I havnt left behind is my behaviour on alcohol. Everytome i go out to a pub or club i end up in a fight or arguement with somebody, my pals are embarrassed by my behaviour and 9 times out of 10 i actualy have no recollection! Im quite a shy person, so when im out a few beers generaly helps, but i just dont know when to stop. This is becoming more and more frequent and i am losing friends and girlfriends because of it. For example went out with pals, ended up making silly childish comments, dont mean to harm people but just feel like im starting to lose it a bit. I am a social drinker, dont drink when im at home, but i have said i would quit on numerous occasions to no avail. Need some guidance but too embarrassed to o somewhere!
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Hi jim, I think that it's somewhat telling when you register your name as a whiskey that you might have a drinking problem. I think that if you admit to yourself that you have a problem (and I think that you already have) then that's already half the battle. You will need to tell other people but you know what? If they're embarrassed by your actions when you go out, then they already know. They will be relieved to hear that you want help, and they'll be glad to offer it. DOn't be embarrassed, be humble! I think you should be proud, even. Talk to someone about getting help. Let me know how it goes, okay?
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today i just got a years probation and sent on a programme for violent drunks after my third assault conviction and resisting arrest, with cautions for intimidation and disorder, plus i have quite a lot of prior for drugs and theft in my late teens, early 20's, but alcohol is the only drug which ever truly held sway over me. one of the latest assault convictions was on a door woman who wasn't even on duty and i don't remember it, another on 1 of 8 men who started following me for doing it. i don't remember a thing. let me tell you, it does not feel good at all to know that you hit a woman. i look at people who do that as s**m. now i am the s**m. this prompted me to quit alcohol on my own and i've been clean for 3 weeks now. i was first arrested for being drunk at 11 and now i'm nearly 30.

if you really want to do it, you can. i'm utterly ashamed it took something like that to prompt me to stop.

don't be me.

as well as external support groups, these are the things that help:

1) wanting to quit. it's as simple and as hard as that. if you want to not drink more than you want to drink, you won't drink.
2) when you get the urge do something else to take your mind off it, weights, running, chin-ups, write poetry, watch a movie, anything, just do something else because the urge will subside after a while. i've done all of those things.
3) don't go out to places where there is alcohol. yeah, that sucks but i've find other ways to socialise like volunteering for a local project that helps troubled kids, i do manual labour for them and there are other volunteers there, these people are all giving there time freely to help others. they are decent people. a lot of them have or have had problems too, that's why they are there. making new connections you can socialise with, without alcohol is important.
4) remember you don't need the drink to get boys/girls. it's easier to pick them up on the street sober than in a club where everyone is competing. there are a lot less people willing to go up and try their luck when it isn't in an artificial environment designed just for "courting". less competition is more win.
5) read what i wrote above. do you want that on your conscience? you will have if you don't stop and the longer you leave it the harder it gets.

remember the urge to drink will become weaker the longer you resist it. so stay firm and don't give in. and if you've already given in, don't use that as an excuse to quit quitting, get right back on your feet take it on the chin, admit to yourself you screwed up and don't do it again.

good luck.
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Try not drinking. My dad is violent when drunk too. He never hurts our family phiscally, but, as a family.... we fell apart. my mom comes home when we fall asleep, she also goes to work before we wake up. Today she came home and started crying for no reason.... She had a reason, She felt that it was her fault that she wasn't seeing us as much as usual, when she had to take the job she has because my dad doesnt have a job. Please, try to do whatever you can. because i have a feeling, you still have a chance... Unlike my dad.
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I am dealing with the same problems when I drink too much. There's a 50/50 chance that I will become aggressive and say and do mean things if I've been drinking. For example, last night I went out with some girls from my work. Everything started off fine, I was laughing and carrying on and then all of a sudden I blacked out and couldn't remember a single thing today when I woke up. I woke up at home, didn't have my car, cell phone, glasses, and couldn't remember how I got there. My friend told me that I walked past someone in the bar knocked their drink out of their hand and kept going, was pouring drinks from the bus station into other people's drinks, took a shot from the bus station (barf), and was trying to start fights with people. I am soooo embarrassed, as I should be. When sober I am kind, and even a mediator but when drunk it's like I become possessed or something. Also, when I am dealing with a lot of stress in life I tend to get like this when drunk.
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Hi all, I noticed here that the last post is from over a year ago. I'd like to know how ya guys have been doing?
I'm 31 years old and I find myself in this same predicament. I'm a calm and peaceful person when sober, and I'm a social drinker who had a few too many tequila shots the other night. This is the 3rd time it happens in the last 6 years. Its not a weekend event, but it gets worse each time. A couple nights ago, I had a terrible night, I blacked out, was violent towards my friends and my fiancée. Luckily I wasn't driving, but I made a huge deal about coming home to where my mom could take care of me, (my friends were drunk too, and I kicked them out) . After my friends and fiancée left, my poor mother had to care for me. I was up for hours, crying, vomiting, telling her she was talking too much(she wasn't), until finally I felt asleep. Woke up not knowing what happened at all, or why I got aggravated in the first place. It had been such a fun night, truly. Up until the moment I completely blacked out. My father is an alcoholic, he drinks everyday, never gets violent just really annoying. I never thought of myself as an alcoholic, but perhaps I am. Should I seek help? AA?

I feel so ashamed of my behavior, so destroyed that I hurt my friends and the man I love, and embarrassed my mother... my entire family and everyone who love me. My fiancée is an angel, as are my friends and my family, who forgive me even after my outrageous behavior. I feel blessed to have them there with me when I blacked out. What could have happened if they weren't? Who could I have hurt? The worst feeling in he world is to know that I could have hurt people I love. I'd never forgive myself. Please help!
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I have spent the last few days googling and reading different stories on chat forums. Trying to find stories that are worse than mine just to make me feel better.

It helps to see I am not entirely alone but it doesn't really change what I have done. Sometimes I can be a messy drunk. I have been cocky, very emotional, cried, said a lot of stupid things about others and myself, peed in bed, made out with someone who isn't my boyfriend and so on...

Rock bottom was a few days ago. For the first time I wasn't just cocky. I was aggressive. I have been comforting myself with this fact before, 'at least I am not one of those people who get aggressive. At least I never PHYSICALLY hurt anyone'...

Well. It is just not true anymore. Because last weekend I PUNCHED my friend in the face several times. Not pinched, hit her with an open hand or pushed her around... PUNCHED. And not just once.

Feel an absolut rotten human. Keep thinking about whst my neighbeurs is thinking? Hearing me and her shouting and screaming? I am thinking, what if she would have fell over? Hit her head? Started to bleed? What would have happened if I had access to s gun (thank f**k I dont live in the US), what would have happened if I used a object? Or a knife? The most horrible scenarious play in my head.

I know nothing good will come out from thinking 'What if', but I cant help myself. All I think about is what kind of person am I? What kind of darkness do I have inside me?

If peeing my bed, fighting and cheating on boyfriends, falling over, talking suicidal and just in general loosing my plot havn't stopped me from drinking before, will this?

I would love to come in contact with all of you struggeling with this... Give me your e-mail if you want.

Ps. I am 20-f*****g-8 and for some amazing and sick reason people seem to have forgiven me. I will obviously never forgive myself but feel grateful for all the amazing people around me.

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Hey I'm going thru the exact same situation *Warning! Do not post your e mail address!* please
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If your aggressive when drunk, you need to moderate to the level you can control your behaviour. If you can't moderate, you need to abstain. If you can't abstain by yourself, then face the fact that you're probably an alcoholic and need the support of AA or SMART. Seek help now, before you seriously hurt someone, or worse
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If your aggressive when drunk, you need to moderate to the level you can control your behaviour. If you can't moderate, you need to abstain. If you can't abstain by yourself, then face the fact that you're probably an alcoholic and need the support of AA or SMART. Seek help now, before you seriously hurt someone, or worse
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This is me down to a T
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Yeah... i need help.. dont wanna give my story.. its really bad.. im happy there are other ppl put there... but the suicidal thoughts from embarrasment are overwhelming.. im not gonna post my email.. where can i find an online AA?
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Same . It's a 50/50 for me . This time I drank so much I blacked out and I might have ruined things with my boyfriend. I'm so sad a devastated.
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Hi would you be willing to write my boyfriend a letter , I went crazy on him and he ended up get arrested because my ex called the cops . We are supposed to get married and now I feel he hates me . My goal is to get many letters from as many people explaining there stories so I can give them all to him.
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