Couldn't find what you looking for?

TRY OUR SEARCH!

my daughter caught my 14 year son having sex with our 11 year old family friend and I dont know what to I am so confused.I feel discussed and my heart is acking inside.

Loading...

That is really a tough one - while 3 years is generally not a big time span at all...the difference between and 11 year old and a 14 year old is pretty significant in terms of physical, emotional and sexual development.  Is there any background to the story?  Was it consensual for both of them?  What did he / she say to explain it?  Have you talked to him at all about it?
Reply

Loading...

User avatar
Health Ace
6885 posts

As Taz says, that's a tough one.

When I was 14, you might have dated a girl one year behind you in school but not two years, without a lot of bad peer pressure. The distance between 14 and 11 is huge. I expect that would be considered rape in most states, consenting or not. At 11 she's not old enough to consent. The police are surely going to take a dim view of it but I don't see how you can keep it from them without commiting a crime yourself. Recent federal laws  have proscribed the reporting of such things by anyone who is aware of it. Most states have backed that up with their own laws. Even priests at confessions are not immune to our current laws. Most police departments can lead you to supportive counseling but they are probably more interested in the legal aspects.

You should certainly be getting some professional counseling for both of them and all others involved, such as parents.

I don't think this can or should be written off as childish behavior.

I feel so bad for you. Do you have someone you can go to for support? There are usually counselors in school systems. I know school is out right now but someone there may be able to help you find the support you need.

Reply

Loading...

The worst of it is they are both boys and it was consensual. The mom of the 11 yr old has told me that her son was already having sex thats what make me sick I never thought it would be with my son also I tried to talk with my son about and he just cried so hard I just left it alone I am finding it hard to look at
him
Reply

Loading...

It probably shouldn't change anything - but I feel like them both being boys does change it a little!  If they were actually having penetrative sex - then I think there may be some intervention necessary - but if not, honestly, I think that is the nature of boys going through puberty!

I don't usually share personal stories on here...but I was actually taught (meaning shown) about masturbation when I was 10 by my cousin/best friend when he had just turned 14. Looking back on it 25 years later - I actually cherish that experience.  I absolutely was not forced or coerced into it.  I was already incredibly curious about all the erections.  And - I'm really glad we had that experience, and he showed me something amazing ...

I don't think your story is any different.  11 year old boys are having sexual feelings for sure.  They are very curious about how it all works, what feels good, etc.  A 14 year old may not be that different.  It all deeds on the situation...how did they get to that point?  Was it curiosity or was it just sex?

I imagine your son must be mortified.  No 14 year old wants their mom to know anything about their sexual life...that is why kids go through all means necessary to hide that they even masturbate from their parents.  To be caught in a sexual situation - with a boy - who happens to only be 11 must be incredibly difficult for him.  While you HAVE to have the conversations - you need to be really sensitive to how he feels.  The response to this could very well shape his sexual future even as an adult psychologically.

Maybe direct him here?  He can post questions and get answers to what he is thinking/wondering without the face to face interaction.  He can even directly message any of us he is comfortable with with questions.  There are some other resources we can share for kids going through puberty as well - as well as resources for gay teens...if that is what this ends up being for him.

Good luck - let us know if there is anything we can do!
Reply

Loading...

User avatar
Health Ace
6885 posts

Perhaps we need to know just what you mean by "having sex".

What were they doing?

Were they masturbating?

What does the other mom mean when she says her son was already having sex?

Many of us seem to have learned how to masturbate at about the age of 10.

From the first post I didn't get any indication this was two boys. If they were masturbating, that's quite common. From what you've added it seems they both knew what they were doing and were just doing it together.  When I was a boy we got together to do it just for fun and probably to see how the other guy did it. Like Taz I learned about it from a cousin when I was 10 also.

My mother walked in on me and two cousins masturbating in my room and all she did was say "supper's ready". Then she closed the door and left.

If that's what they were doing I really think you should try to change your feelings about it and let him know you accept it and it's nothing to be ashamed of or to feel guilty or bad about. If you can do that I think the bond between you and him will become much better.

 

 

 

Reply

Loading...


Don't put a fake post up, you are clearly not the original writter of this topic
Reply

Loading...


Sicko!!! Don't tell me that you are trying to convince everyone that you're the original writer of this discussion. Anyone can tell that you aren't lannybishop you id**t. Don't ever do that again.

Reply

Loading...

Well i don't really tell my personal stories but this was good i was 14 (im male) i went out with this girl for 2 yrs and she was staying with me one night we were in bed and i took my clothes off in front of her and i got her to take off hers eventually she was uncomfortable at first but we used protection i put my hand on her breast and my other on her bum i played with her sexually she seemed to enjoy it i loved it i loved the feeling of a womans body i touched her privates with my penis and kissed her passionatly my mum came in and saw us she was shocked she spoke to me the next day and said that i should have done it when i was older just speak tp him he'll understand this and hopefully remember in future
Reply

Loading...

i am 14 and mastirbate its normal me and my friend f**k all of t

he time

Reply

Loading...