Hi! My boyfriend and I have been best friends for 4+ years. We recently got together and our relationship lasted about 3 months because we did long distance and he also has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. He was the best. He treated me like a princess, complimented me every day, made sure I was emotionally stable, was affectionate, loving, warm-hearted, everything I could ever dream of. Before our break, he was having suicidal thoughts and wanted to get help but he didn't want to let me go. A few days later we both decided it'd be best if we took a break to find himself and get better until he came back home and see where things go. That break would last 1.5 months and he would message me once ever 2-3 weeks or so just to check up and have small conversations. The last week, before we met up again, he became oddly cold and gave short one-worded answers. It was strange but I thought nothing of it, I just thought it was him being depressed or anxious. So the night before we met up, he was being cold again and I asked him why. He said he'd rather talk about it in person so me, being the anxious over-thinker, I jumped to conclusions and asked if he was going to break up with me and he said yes. I was devastated because I had waited 1.5 months, planning our future and having high hopes that we'd get back together and things will be fine again, and then I was just broken up with????? He then explained that he HAS to break up with me and forced himself to push away from me because i """deserve better"" and hes going to a psychiatrist to get treated for his bipolar disorder. I understand he needs help because the past few months, i've been pushing him to seek help and become better and emotionally stable while I stayed by his side and supported him. I never judged him for his disorder, I never thought less of him or spoke up about our relationship problems with our friends (which is why im writing this anonymously lol) so i understand that he needs to find himself, get better, be by himself. I dont know if it's because i'm selfish and my thoughts are clouded by love and emotions, but I never thought he'd BREAK UP with me officially. I thought we'd always be on a break and sometime come back together. I dont know what to do!! Someone please relate and help me. I DO want him to get better and i understand that he needs to get his mental health under control before things get worse, but I just want to be with him :'( I suffer with depression and anxiety as well but its not as severe as his conditions. I'm sorry for being selfish but I asked him if I should wait for him until he gets better, hoping that our paths will cross again, and he said maybe. He said hes 100% open to the idea of MAYBE getting back together in the future. He doesnt want me to wait for him because he said its not fair for the both of us. I dont understand, Im confused and sad and frustrated and I miss him so much. I feel like I lost my best friend and lover. He was the best and I want him back so badly. I just want to support him and show him that he's important and special. Idk, im confused and hurting. If someone out there has advice or a similar experience, please let me know ASAP. Thank you x much love to those suffering from mental health or in a long distance relationship.
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