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my girlfriend has bipolar we meet 3 months ago and feel in love she told me she has this problem she had her first out break just latly, she seemed like a diffrent person she didnt want me around when we were together she was always looking to get away from me,she says she loves me but she doesnt seem the same. i was just wondering is this a normal thing with a person with bipolar ? %-) %-)

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It's fairly normal. Give them some space when they get like that and make sure you are there with open arms when that mood changes. It's not easy for either people in the relationship.
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Your baby will experience severe mania and then depression... It's a tidal wave, but you'll learn about it just being with her.... Always be sure to console her, make her feel loved... when she is depressed... and when she's manic? Make sure she doesn't over spend...

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My girlfriend hasn't been diagnosed yet but we are pretty sure she is bipolar. I need help nailing down the signs that she is experiencing the onset of an episode. Usually, it starts with her telling me she loves me so much it might be unhealthy. How can I counter this and help her.
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yes normal for bipolar. you just have to understand that she has a problem that she is trying to get help for. she may hate you one minute and love you like no tomorrow the next. she might say things that hurt you to push you away, and things you love to hear to bring you back.

it's going to be a rollar coaster ride, but if you love her enough to stick with her, stand by your lady. when you feel like she is dragging you down to the point that you are depressed, you might want to get out of the relation ship. two depressed people don't make a right. she needs you to stay strong so you can help her through if you are willing. don't give up on her.
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you need to be warned that this relation ship is not for the faint of heart. you have to be very strong and confident in yourself. when i first met my bipolar girlfriend 7 months ago i was laid back confident and trusting. now after all the hurtful things she has said to me i am always suspicious of her and am not really able to provide her with the patience i used to so we fight all the time. bipolar people are hypocrites unintentionally; they can get mad at you for anything in the world but if you get upset at them youre being "insensitive". the problem is its really hard when i get so much emotional abuse. ny gf has broke up with me 7 times (about once a month) and its always over something ridiculous. she is so lovey dovey one day, telling me she wants to be w me forever and the next day she ignores me, gets irritated at me and says she feels smothered, even tho she demands all of my free time to the point where i cant study or go out with friends for fear of her going crazy on me. i love her more than anyone else in the world, she is so sweet and an amazingly talented artist but at the same time its the hardest most emotionally draining relationship i have ever had. i cant tell you how many times she has made me a total wreck, blubbering adn crying adn feeling horrible when in actuality everything is her fault. but you have to suck it all up. i recommend doing drugs or seeing a therapist if you want to stick it out. when i was on oxycontin all the time i put up with her alot better
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Seriously, I have been going out with this girl I feel is my true love, and she says same thing back...We have been together for over a year and during the beginning of the relationship she put me through some severe mental abuse, she always would hold feelings for her ex's. She even after had our baby together suffered through postpartum and made me move out. She still had feeling for her ex. 2 months after that she realizes she truly is in love with me and not him....His penis is small and mine is A LOT bigger....I hope that is not why she sticks with me...I hope its mentally for me. Her mother keeps trying to get them together, keeps inviting him to come over or sleep over. My girl keeps making him sleep on the couch but she wakes up sometimes to him laying right next to her. One night she was having a rough time and he was holding her all night she said. I feel very disrespected.....to the point where none of this will ever be fixed with her ex.....Makes me want to brake up with her, but I am so deeply in love with her. Can I trust her? I feel that I can.....but Bipolar people are confusing I guess.....Are they known as liers? I feel that I know her like the back of my hand.
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WOW!!

I must say, that in my experiences with my bipolar gf, I have experienced many of the exact same things! I have been with my girlfriend for a year (this month) and this is definately not a relationship for the weak of heart, or unsure of resolve.

She would have extremes of highs and lows that changed within the blink of an eye!! One moment completely pissed off over some ridiculous thing that I would never understand, and the next she would be completely in love.. The problem was, that after all the fights, after all the hateful things she has said to me, neither do I have the patience that I once had.. By the time she has a lightning quick change from deppression or anger to tha manic side, I am thoroughly pissed off and completely unforgiving, and she just cannot understand why I cannot just be happy with her like she is even when I scream at her that I am NOT bipolar!!!

Don't get me wrong, she always feels sorry for her uncalled for attacks, and I realize it at the time, and know that she doesn't really mean it, or will at least regret it later, but I am beginning to become so tired of the endless battles and my patience wears thin.

She too, is much the hypocrite, screaming and cursing at complete strangers, or worse, close friends (usually mine) for complete, and utter wrongs, that she has herself committed only moments previously or will in moments to come. But when pointed out to her, "It's different." And always will be when it comes to her...

I have lost all but my two closest friends, going from very popular, to feeling sorry for, to "dude, what tha ****?" to "just forget it" as I blew off all my friends and any parties to "spend my time with HER." Because otherwise, she wasn't happy, and I was apparently "cheating on her" just by being around other people, strangely, even guys!!!

My girlfriend, who has had two kids from a previous relationship also talks quite frequently of her Ex's and how she still cares about them (always will) and the only reason for breaking up was for stupid things (though I wonder if they just couldn't stand her anymore...) But then she will turn around and tell me how she loves me so much, and always will, and love no one else!! (though I feel so paranoid as she continues to go to parites all the time, getting drunk with people known to enjoy sex with women in relations, and her best friends she terms herself, are whores. Not to mention that if situations were swapped, and i was partyin while she spent entire day studyin her ass off.......???? Death and destruction would come about!!!) And I am always reminded that I most definately have the biggest penis she has ever seen in her life..... (ironic?)

To say the least, she is confusing as hell, but not without her rewards. I love her deeply, have the greatest sex ever with her, and live to see her smile!! The only reason for my above comments are to warn any who seek a realationship with a bipolar female....
It WILL be DIFFICULT!! And if you donnot go into the relationship expecting all this, and worse, than you go into battle blindfolded and have no chance of survival. Also, only to be fair, you must look at yourself, and ask yourself, "Am i strong enough for this?"

Hope this sheds enlightenment on any decision, and goodluck to all who are in similiar relations!
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wow its so nice to see so many other people going through the same thing I am. It sureal how much i can relate to you all!!!
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Wow, it really hurts to know so many people right here are experiencing this painful rollercoaster like I have for the past year.
My BP whatever he is right now hasn't taken his meds since 5 days ago & disappeared on a party binge for 49 hours only to return yesterday morning & lay around all day, totally uncaring of my feelings or the damage done. I tried to reach out for help when I saw the signs, but it was late Thursday & the weekend came-everything closed.
I've known him for a few years as a friend, lover & boyfriend. We have a lot in common & get along very well. Like Soulmates.
He made many advances over that time, we kept running into each other, things evolved & now I am totally in love with him. Everyone sees & says how good we are together. He constantly comes back & tells me this one said this or that about us.....Friends, kids etc... have all encouraged us.
I knew something was going on inside him, but wasn't sure what it was. He started to talk to me about it & when he asked for help, I was right there & immediately took him to our local VA hospital.
I have been taking him there for 3 months now, sometimes 3 times a week & I'm very involved in his care. He says I've been there for him 200% & says he never would have followed threw if it wasn't for me.If it wasn't for me he might be dead right now.
He has very little income, barely functional with responsibilities & I have been taking care of him in every way. I wanted to help, but he takes me for granted. It is sometimes a very confusing, hurtful, thankless job & I seem to get the brunt of it all. I have been threw very rough times myself & now I'm feeling very depressed, used & alone in this world & feel like no one is taking care of me. He acts like my boyfriend in many general ways & when he talks, it's us, we & our, one minute he says we are together & the next, he flip flops & pushes me away. He also has built a fatherly type of relationship w/ my 6 yo son. He puts me threw hell with this & I don't want my son to get hurt.We were left suddenly homeless & moved in with him. I didn't have anywhere to go & he needed the help so here we are.
I've been very strong & positive, but I don't have any support, medical insurance, meds to make me feel better, or anyone to turn too.
I'm done being the supporter because I'm an emotional wreck & frankly if he doesn't care back then why should I waste my (& my sons)heart space on him & his problems. I wanted it to work so badly & we will hurt for a long time & miss him, but I'm already packed to move out, just having problems finding a place in this school district.
They (VA) are giving him a complete evaluation -medical & psychiatric. He was diagnosed Bipolar & put on Depakote about 2.5 months ago. I can't tell if the meds are working because he drinks & doesn't take the meds right.

For instance, he still has up & downs, grumpy moods where everything rattles him or stresses him out & emotionally flip flops.He gets close to me, acts affectionate & then runs away & rejects me.
Just last weekend-He said he is with me, acknowledged it all, not going anywhere, loves me, wants me, really likes me, but he doesn't really seem to feel or show it like a normal person does. He can be many ways at the same time like very funny, charming & cool, like he is ok, but then distant, uncaring, mean, threatening, cruel, insensative, cocky, arrogant-he plays games with me whether he means it or not-not everything can be from Bipolar. That is like a trip wire & it's hard to see the line when you are not bipolar.
Today is Tuesday. Friday night he got drunk with his buddies, I had a few beers, but they were mixing. All of a sudden he made a sexual advance to me. I let him know it bothered me because he hasn't shown me any affection in a week or so & has been sleeping on the couch.Then he turned around to me & blurted out in front of his buddies that he loves me, but he isn't in love with me. I got very hurt & upset & felt humiliated etc...
I am very careful of how I say & approach issues with him, when we talk about things, I try to keep it simple & not nag him at all. I can't keep putting my life & feelings on hold & need to be there for my son, but this is all very distracting.
Most of the time, it's ok & he is receptive, but some things he puts up a wall because he emotionally can't deal with them. When he is having a good spell he openly talks more & I seem to be his girlfriend then. He admitted about a month ago that he is now feeling things he put behind him years ago & says that he sees as well as everyone else how good I am for him.He even said he wanted to have a son with me & asked me to have my tubes untied. Before he even spoke to me, he talked with his 2 teenage daughters about it. I am not having anymore children & he is not thinking clearly-why bring a son into the world when his whole life is in shambles & he isn't handling anything.
He is a grown man almost 50 yo.It's time to grow the heck up.I can't make him do anything like stop drinking/etc..., causing problems for himself, using bad judgment, messing his meds up & I can't make him feel in love with me.Everyone says he will probably hit bottom when I move out & realize what he lost, but he doesn't seem to phased right now.Instead he is putting it off on me in his own mind & acts like I did something wrong.
Today he had 3 appts at the VA & they called & said his psychiatrist is out sick, but I secretly took the call & let them know he has other appts & needs to be seen even if he shows up acting fine-he isn't. Somebody needed a heads up & his caregivers need to treat him, but I have to separate from it now-he will be all on his own, no me, no family.
LITERALLY ALONE except for his little dog. He is very close to losing his house, his kids are away on vacation & are getting fed up too, I'm trying to move out. His party friends aren't going to help him. He has no job or license, the phone will be disconnected, his bills probably will go unpaid & I'm no longer stocking the frig for him or flipping the bills for him.
For the first time, I am not taking him to the doctors, but reminded him he had the appts last night. He got up off the couch & took a shower & went to the VA alone w/ his dog even though he lost his drivers license & the cops know his car.I hope he admits everything to them & asks for the help he needs, but I cannot do this anymore.I deserve so much better than this & my son deserves to have his mom & be happy.
Bipolar or not. I can not be played with, abused or taken for granted anymore & I also don't want to enable him either.
Sorry, but now I'm hurting & in need of help & support & guess what-I have none. How are the rest of you feeling, about the same?
Thanks for listening.
K29
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He came back from his appts & when I passed by 5 hours ago he was at the bar down the road with no license & his jeep clearly parked in back, he may have left by now & gone ??? Gotta wonder how it can go looney from one day to the next. He is not just Bipolar, he is a heartless, game playin, using jerk!
If he does something stupid like DRIVE, he will end up w/ a felony. He is avoiding me & can't face me cause now he claims after everything I have done with him & for him that he isn't in love with me. Gee I wonder if he ends up in the county jail or local PD if he will suddenly be in love with me & begging me to get him out-NO WAY!!!! No one else is there for him-oh well!
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Hi
Ive been seeing my girlfriend for 8 months now,she is not diagnosed as bipolar but she has all the signs,her moodswings, her heightened elation and absolute feelings of hopelessness,i never know whats coming next. we were supposed to get married in October this year it was a whirlwind,one minute we were lovers then she decided she wanted to get engaged and then the next week she wanted to get married,i love her dearly,she sings,paints sculpts but cant hold a normal job,i support her and her son of 8 with my salary and she says she doesnt need me and didnt ask me for anything.Anyway as i type this we have split up AGAIN!!
A month after we started making wedding arrangements she changed her mind,this is after she made it known to the world we were getting married.It was pretty embarrasing for me to change my facebook status which she made me put up in the 1st place.DAMN!! the things we do for love.
One minute she tells me she is completely in love and wants to spend the rest of her life with me and is sorry she changed her mind,and the next hour or 3 later she wants me to pack my stuff and leave and when i do she will block me out of her life .erase all photos of us and delete all of me from her life.Then a week or 2 later she will call and say she is sorry and cry her eyes out and i go back to her because i love her
Im pretty buggered now after 8 months of this turmoil and almost ready to give up.....HELP
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My girlfriend and I have been together for almost 6 years. She is getting worse and does see it but is not doing anything about it. I know exactly how all of you are feeling and wish I could say something that would make everything different, but there is nothing to say because everyone of you is correct. My girlfriend has helped me to raise my daughter. (Other parent not in the picture at all. A whole other story.) My daughter loves her very much. She is nine and has had my girlfriend with her since she was 3. I feel like I am going into a downward spiral due to dealing with this for the last almost 6 years. My problem is that she has literally no where to go at all. I don't want her living on the streets. She is a human being. She has been to the Mental Hospital a number of times but the evaluate her and release her usually within 3 days. Her longest stay has been for 4 days. How can I live with myself if I break it off with her and she either kills herself or ends up living on the streets without her meds.
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hi,
I am 22 years old and a bipolar young woman. I was fortunate enough to be diagnosed when I was 17, which is earlier than a lot of people. After i was put on the correct medication (for me lithium and adderal, i have bad adhd as well). I became me again and didnt have a manic episode for over 3 years (2005-2008), because I took my medication. What set off a series of manic episodes eventually culminating in another attempted suiscide was a doctor prescribing me the wrong birth control, (the wrong birth control was prescribed twice to me by the same doctor but the second time I realized what was happening early on). This is a problem that a lot of bipolar woman have and do not realize because there doctor says that it is ok to take the generic or widely used birth control pills, all which contain a lot of estrogin. It is becoming more widely known that most bipolar women can not tolerate or get used to these types of birth control pills causing them to rapidly cycle between moods and "act crazy". Please tell your girlfriends to check there birth control methods and to ask there gyno for birth control called loestrum FE, it will not cause a manic episode because it doesnt contain any estrogin.
I understand if this post sounds a little weird, but I can relate to both sides of the situation. I was horrible to my ex boyfriend and he took everything in stride at the time but held a grudge for about a year and a half even though he knew the birth control i was put on caused my horrible mood swings, but i dont blame him for still being angry about it. bipolar people are very hard to be in a relationship with, we can be horrible and cruel people. It really is hard to forgive the things that are said during an episode, everything is said with such conviction making it hurt the most.
Again I am only a woman dealing with this problem, but I think the best advice comes from experience. Get your girlfriends to a psychiatrist (including a psychologist because someone to talk to other than you is the best thing) and get on the correct medication, including birth control. If there medication is taken correctly then they will become the person that you fell in love with and continue to have little to no manic episodes.
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I can really relate to this, I've been in a relationship for the past 4 months, I've known my b/friend for years as a very fun and enteraining person. I was really happy to start a relationship with him which very quickly developed into love and even an engagment ring. It didn't take me long to work out that he was bipolar and when I asked him he admitted that that he was diagnosed years ago but doesn't want to go onto medication.

In the short space of 4 months I feel tottally head wrecked and depressed myself, I admit I do love him but I don't think I can deal with this rollercoaster at all and it's such a shame because he's a brillaint person to be around when he's not down or moody. I have told him to seek proffessional help or I can't put myself through this relationship anymore...although it hurts to say that because somehow I don't think he will go on meds but I know this relationship won't get any better and I'm gonna end up more hurt the longer this goes on
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