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My husband has the weirdest personality like Jekyll & Hyde.When he is on marijuana he is the funniest,sweetest & loving person.He is really easy going & all is well when he is stoned.I hate that he does the drug but I guess I have just put up with it for years.When he is sober,we do have some good times but heaven forbid I say the wrong thing! He snaps at me.He gets pissed easily.he is super lazy & doesn't lift a finger to clean around the house.He's quite the couch potato & He constantly leaves messes everywhere. I find myself nagging at him to do the smallest things.His reply is "that's not my mess,why should I pick it up" etc.He thinks I should do every damn thing around the house since he has a harder,better paying job than me (so he says).We always argue & he puts me down by making me feel like a nobody & calls me names at times.I feel like he does not care about my feelings & I'm always in the wrong or to blame.We can argue till we are blue in the face & then other topics usually arise too which puts us into it more.Sometimes he can be like this towards our 9 yr old son too.I have suggested that we get some counseling so we can see eye to eye & to just better our relationship.We have a fabulous sex life so nothing wrong in that department.I do love him very much though but he seems to think this is all ok when is not.How do I get this through his head that we need to work on managing these problems (& his drug prob too)?

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588 posts
I had similar problems with my husband. He was not moody though but he never did anything around the house (since this is of course what his mother thought him).
After a lot of nagging and arguing (and being on the verge to split up), I have made a plan for us with obligations - who does what around the house and when and did not let him get out of his duties.

It actually worked. The things is that we had the same salaries and i did a hell lot more around our son, so he had to go with this.

I said, ok, am relly trying to stop nagging to you but this is why we need a plan since we live together and should both have responsibilities toward a child and our house.

See if your husband is willing to do so.

I know this is just one aspect of your problem but I hope I helped at least a bit.

It is so annoying when a conversation (communication) that should be constructive and helpful between spouses turns into a meaningless fight and you end up blaming each other for number of things. I just hate that :-(((
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Thanks for the input.I will give that a try & see what happens :O)
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