Hi, thanks to all of you for posting your cmments, i have read them all and tryed various things, one thing i find usefull is simply "working out" or going for a run to improve your cardiovascular system. :-) improved blood flow is the key to victory, :-D
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This may be a little off of what you are trying to say, try to do something 'different'. Maybe try it up her ass or try it with a guy. I'm pretty sure it's not something that's wrong with your penis if you can get it to get erected. But try to get something to turn you on more while having sex.
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I think it has to do with masturbation. I have no problem getting hard and staying hard during masturbation, but during sex, same thing as y'all... Rock hard during foreplay, then when its time for sex I lose the boner, i don't go completely soft, i just go like semi.
I really am starting to think it is because of how hard I jerk off daily. I got a ha****b and kept telling her to go harder, she seemed worried she would hurt it.. At the end she told me that I liked it really hard and asked if it was sore! (it wasnt) hahaha I'm not her first guy and she told me that I jerk off really hard (grabbing it really tightly when jerking up and down).
I'm going to try to either stop jerking off days in advance and also not squeezing to tight when i do it. Maybe im making it lose sensitivity from jerking it so hard and so often. (damaging nerve endings or something)
I really am starting to think it is because of how hard I jerk off daily. I got a ha****b and kept telling her to go harder, she seemed worried she would hurt it.. At the end she told me that I liked it really hard and asked if it was sore! (it wasnt) hahaha I'm not her first guy and she told me that I jerk off really hard (grabbing it really tightly when jerking up and down).
I'm going to try to either stop jerking off days in advance and also not squeezing to tight when i do it. Maybe im making it lose sensitivity from jerking it so hard and so often. (damaging nerve endings or something)
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I think it has to do with masturbation. I have no problem getting hard and staying hard during masturbation, but during sex, same thing as y'all... Rock hard during foreplay, then when its time for sex I lose the boner, i don't go completely soft, i just go like semi.
I really am starting to think it is because of how hard I jerk off daily. I got a ha****b and kept telling her to go harder, she seemed worried she would hurt it.. At the end she told me that I liked it really hard and asked if it was sore! (it wasnt) hahaha I'm not her first guy and she told me that I jerk off really hard (grabbing it really tightly when jerking up and down).
I'm going to try to either stop jerking off days in advance and also not squeezing to tight when i do it. Maybe im making it lose sensitivity from jerking it so hard and so often. (damaging nerve endings or something)
to make a long story short... STOP CHOKING YOUR CHICKEN SO HARD AND SO OFTEN OR YOU'LL BREAK IT!
I really am starting to think it is because of how hard I jerk off daily. I got a ha****b and kept telling her to go harder, she seemed worried she would hurt it.. At the end she told me that I liked it really hard and asked if it was sore! (it wasnt) hahaha I'm not her first guy and she told me that I jerk off really hard (grabbing it really tightly when jerking up and down).
I'm going to try to either stop jerking off days in advance and also not squeezing to tight when i do it. Maybe im making it lose sensitivity from jerking it so hard and so often. (damaging nerve endings or something)
to make a long story short... STOP CHOKING YOUR CHICKEN SO HARD AND SO OFTEN OR YOU'LL BREAK IT!
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thank god i found this site, i have the same problem too, im 17yrs old, i have the most beautiful gf eva, i love her to bit, im hard when we meet up, when he having foreplay im like a rock but the moment it come to putting the condom on and having sex, i just go limp, we have managed to have se many times but this problem is realy becoming a pain and im hating it, and im sure my gf is too, she keeps telling me its ok but i know its not, anyone know how to mantain a hard erection ? please help me, i dont wana lose her over this, she the best thing thats eva happened to me, thanks anyone who can help
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Guys,
It's not unusual for men to go a little soft during intercourse.
When we masturbate, we can feel exactly what we're doing at every step, and as a result, it's a tight little feedback loop that we use to keep us at peak stimulation.
The process of intercourse can be very exciting, but it also allows for some less that total stimulation. As a result, sometimes we aren't as firm as we might assume we will always be. And sometimes, the erection will fail. It's no big thing... as long as you don't freak out about it. If you make a federal case out of it, it will be a problem. The trick is to accept it and laugh about it with your partner. There will always be another time... ;-)
It's not unusual for men to go a little soft during intercourse.
When we masturbate, we can feel exactly what we're doing at every step, and as a result, it's a tight little feedback loop that we use to keep us at peak stimulation.
The process of intercourse can be very exciting, but it also allows for some less that total stimulation. As a result, sometimes we aren't as firm as we might assume we will always be. And sometimes, the erection will fail. It's no big thing... as long as you don't freak out about it. If you make a federal case out of it, it will be a problem. The trick is to accept it and laugh about it with your partner. There will always be another time... ;-)
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There could be several causes to this problem, some men just can't feel anything when wearing a condom. That happened to my boyfriend a few times with a certain kind of condom. Also a few of my friends had that problem, but the reason for them was not the protection, it was the person. They turned out to be more into guys than girls and that was what stopped them from enjoying sex.
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i JUST started having this problem, but this has been going on ever since i slowed down (i.e. completely discontinued) my physical activity levels. so im assuming that this is the problem. ive been working out again since saturday and am going to try again this weekend. ill reply when i come up with something.
(also ive recently taken to eating lots of fast food, which i have stopped in the last few days and shall continue to do)
(also ive recently taken to eating lots of fast food, which i have stopped in the last few days and shall continue to do)
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I have a 42 year old male that has been fighting this same problem for years. I can't afford to see a doctor, but I've been told that I won't be given Viagra anyway, because I am capable of getting an erection, and therefore "it is all in my head."
It's not all in my head, though, and I don't understand why I have this problem. Anyway, I have had good success with herbal treatments. I don't want to give any name brands, because I don't want this to look like spam and I want it taken seriously, and besides, what works for me might not work for everyone. The best product I used was pulled off the market recently for having a non-FDA approved ingredient, but after several tries (and much wasted money) I've found another product that works almost as well.
I've made a promise to myself to study the information found on websites and to eat more libido-enhancing foods and to do more physical exercise; I have no idea if this will work, but at least two people in this forum have stated that increased exercise has improved their performance.
In the meantime, I'm sticking by my herbals. They seem to work, for the most part, and if you are trying to get Viagra (which doesn't always work for some men, we've already seen), then you'll find the herbals are defintely cheaper... a pill usually breaks down to about a dollar, which means I can usually successfully have intercouse for only $2-3, versus $10 for Viagra, and I don't have to try to talk a doctor into allowing me to take it.
I hope this helps.
It's not all in my head, though, and I don't understand why I have this problem. Anyway, I have had good success with herbal treatments. I don't want to give any name brands, because I don't want this to look like spam and I want it taken seriously, and besides, what works for me might not work for everyone. The best product I used was pulled off the market recently for having a non-FDA approved ingredient, but after several tries (and much wasted money) I've found another product that works almost as well.
I've made a promise to myself to study the information found on websites and to eat more libido-enhancing foods and to do more physical exercise; I have no idea if this will work, but at least two people in this forum have stated that increased exercise has improved their performance.
In the meantime, I'm sticking by my herbals. They seem to work, for the most part, and if you are trying to get Viagra (which doesn't always work for some men, we've already seen), then you'll find the herbals are defintely cheaper... a pill usually breaks down to about a dollar, which means I can usually successfully have intercouse for only $2-3, versus $10 for Viagra, and I don't have to try to talk a doctor into allowing me to take it.
I hope this helps.
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There is a very simple answer to this problem. When men are young – they can f**k a wall socket and stay hard. Middle age men need a lot more stimulation. Old men can’t f**k anything because the equipment is broken.
When a middle age man masturbates, he is usually watching porno, or thinking about some movie star, etc., another words – a perfect stimulating experience. He is not thinking about an overweight, hairy, whiny, 40-something woman, with bad breath and blotchy skin. However, the reality is that that’s usually who he is asked to f**k. This was not a problem at 19, but at 49 – big problem. To complicate matters more – men really need visual stimulation (that’s why we like porn).
So, what’s the solution? There is only one thing – close your eyes tight and try to think about someone else. I know, it is not easy if not impossible. But it is the only thing that will work.
When a middle age man masturbates, he is usually watching porno, or thinking about some movie star, etc., another words – a perfect stimulating experience. He is not thinking about an overweight, hairy, whiny, 40-something woman, with bad breath and blotchy skin. However, the reality is that that’s usually who he is asked to f**k. This was not a problem at 19, but at 49 – big problem. To complicate matters more – men really need visual stimulation (that’s why we like porn).
So, what’s the solution? There is only one thing – close your eyes tight and try to think about someone else. I know, it is not easy if not impossible. But it is the only thing that will work.
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you hav excellent advice. however, what if it is the partner that is not only incapable of laughing about the matter but freakas out and gets frustrated because she is under the very mistaken impression that this is somehow her fault?
i'm 100% positive that this is something that i need to take care of in some capacity (reduced masturbation, better diet, etc) but the mental aspect is just as important and i'm to the point where i fear both my flaccidity and her extremely negative reaction to it.
i'm 100% positive that this is something that i need to take care of in some capacity (reduced masturbation, better diet, etc) but the mental aspect is just as important and i'm to the point where i fear both my flaccidity and her extremely negative reaction to it.
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Well, this is a major problem that many men's have, when they go for Sex, first time...
But I will say , that these thing can happen, but you and your partner should not be worried, about this, rather you should try to cure this problem, you can consult your doctor, if this problem happens on regular basis, but if it happen in your starting tries, then you need not to be worried...
But I will say , that these thing can happen, but you and your partner should not be worried, about this, rather you should try to cure this problem, you can consult your doctor, if this problem happens on regular basis, but if it happen in your starting tries, then you need not to be worried...
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I think you've make a hellofa lot of assumptions here. It's pretty amazing that you're able to psychoanalyze the situation after only a few text messages from the subject.
Frankly, your advise might work, but I hardly think that "This is the only thing that will help."
I think there are a lot of men who are approaching this age range who do love a woman, no matter what her flaws or imperfections. And there are women who will also love a man despite his flaws and occassional erection difficulties.
There's a comment that he fears his erection problems as much as he fears her negative reaction. I think that speaks volumes about the situation and the climate. I think some counseling is in order, if only to clarify what can be done, and do get both of them away from watching and studying their reactions so closely.
The advice to relax might have been right.
Frankly, your advise might work, but I hardly think that "This is the only thing that will help."
I think there are a lot of men who are approaching this age range who do love a woman, no matter what her flaws or imperfections. And there are women who will also love a man despite his flaws and occassional erection difficulties.
There's a comment that he fears his erection problems as much as he fears her negative reaction. I think that speaks volumes about the situation and the climate. I think some counseling is in order, if only to clarify what can be done, and do get both of them away from watching and studying their reactions so closely.
The advice to relax might have been right.
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