Erection during intercourse

Sweet Violet, if you have secrets to share, please do so. I am 47, experiencing the same problem with a 54 YO sexy guy! I thought perhaps he's not into me, but he loves it when I blow him. Any insight is appreciated. Monica

You are an i***t. Don't reply if you can't articulate or be helpful.

Stay away from highe speed porn,you need higher dopamine to keep strong erection because of highe speed porn,real women can't jump your dopamine as highe speed porn,go 11 days no porn or mustrbation or nude photos and you will have the strong erection you dream about,pleas share my post with others

you're waste, why would you laugh at your roomate? people like you...

Hi thought I was the only one having this problem too.Been having this issue since I was 29 years old.Getting an erection from masturbation was not a problem at all but sometimes but when it came to sexual intercourse I would lose or not get an erection at all.Some people blame it on watching too much porn but I don't think so.Unlike sex I think I am more relax when I masturbate, there's no pressure to perform,etc so I am able to get and keep an erection.Anxiety is our enemy.

Does holding urine before intercourse and during intercourse affects the erection? It seems that I'm not hard during sex as I used to be.

Hello all.

If there is one thing that becomes evident after reading your posts, it is that most of you do not have so much a physical problem as you do a mental one. (No insult intended at all.) To put it very bluntly -- and crudely -- if you can't f**k her, it's because you don't want to f**k her !  Ok, hear me out... I have encountered the same situation in myself, but I believe that I have an answer as to the reasons behind it:

(Caveat -- Actual medical or physical problems MUST be addressed by a physician.)  We are assuming here that the "equipment" is perfectly functional -- under very particular and well-defined circumstances. Most of the respondents here seem to indicate that they are fine with masturbation, oral sex (on them) or other types of "foreplay" activities. Which means the problem is not so much with the mechanism itself, as it is with what controls the mechanism. Thinking it is caused by too much masturbation is folly. Both males and females possess the ability to masturbate without injury or impairment far beyond what most people manage to do. There IS something to the idea that someone here has mentioned regarding the patterns of sexual excitement that one gets "addicted" to by frequent masturbation. Kind of the way many males ejaculate earlier than their partners would like because they have trained themselves to cum fast while masturbating (don't want to get caught, gotta get back to work or class, want a quick result... whatever). Men can UN-LEARN this technique if they have to. Which brings me to the point I'm trying to make:

As you may have already found, pleasure and sexual satisfaction (especially erection and orgasm) happen in your BRAIN, not in your body. Your mind takes the physical sensations you (or others) create, and mixes them with past experiences, fantasies, desires, feelings about the kind of man we want to be, and our often unrealistic expectations, then tells your body what to do -- or NOT do -- about it. You brain quite literally has the ability to talk you out of having sex with someone. Even if you only feel naughty or bad for having sex with someone subconsciously; if subconsciously you feel that you might actually be raping the woman you love and are afraid of hurting her, or making her pregnant, or failing to be the best lover she's ever had -- or whatever -- that's enough to derail the entire experience and shut it all down. Remember too, that intercourse, more than foreplay, requires giving up a good deal of control -- once you are inside her you willingly surrender some of your control over what's happening to her needs. That loss of control of the situation, even subconsciously, can shoot holes iin the whole attempt.

Some here have suggested that the questioner is actually gay, and the thought of entering a woman's vagina is so against what he truly feels deep inside his sexual psyche, that he cannot go against it when the time comes (so to speak). I know from my own experience that this IS a legitimate possibility. Although I have had frequent sexual encounters with both sexes over the course of my 60-odd years, and would consider myself to be on the bi-sexual spectrum, I have always been unable to perform when asked to engage in anal intercourse -- with another male. Consciously, I am "up for it" right up to the edge, and then my mind, which doesn't REALLY want me to do it, shuts down my erection, and no tried and true method of arousal can make it happen for me. Happens every time.

So, consider the possibility that for some reason -- probably unknown to you (or denied by you) at the time -- tells you that you don't really WANT to be inside that vagina, that somehow it's wrong, and you mustn't go through with it. You may never have a desire for another male; you may be the biggest horn-dog for girls that ever went through puberty, but something in your head is stopping you from honestly wanting, NEEDING to be and to cum inside her at that moment. You need to find out what that is, and you cannot lie to yourself and expect your mind to look the other way.