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Okay, I am really concerned about what pain my girlfriend will have to go through if we have sex. I know it hurts, but for how long, and what does it feel like? How can I also prevent her from feeling pain. We are both teens. High school, so there must be a certain age where it feels a certain way. Oh, I know it won't feel great the first time, but as soon as you have been given the chance to both become arroused again, is it okay to have sex again right after? I mean I know it will take time to recharge, but if it hurts the first time, I want it to feel extrordanairy for her the second time. I am really, really, really, worried for her safety and I want her not to feel excruciating pain.... Does it hurt that bad?????? I don't want her to get hurt, thats all.

Sincerely, Seth.

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I hope I'm not replying too late. It is very caring that you are concerned about your girlfriend. Yes, having intercourse for the first time can be very painful and, likely, not a happy or pleasurable experience. I would recommend that the two of you enjoy a fun, romantic date, then take your time sitting/relaxing/kissing each other, enjoying foreplay before having sex. Please be sure that she is truly ready and look after her emotional and sexual needs (ex. you providing oral sex and her having orgasm through clitorial contact) before you move on to intercourse. Losing her virginity is something she will remember forever... down to the song playing in the background. Please find someplace private, comfortable and romantic, not the backseat of your car or in the basement where parents/siblings possibly could come home. If you really "love" her, maybe give her a small gift before she goes home. Naturally, use a condom and bring a few extras in case they break. Hope that helps...
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Unfortunately, there is nothing that you can do about it. Usually, having intercourse for the first time is really painful and broken hymen and losing virginity usually results in blood and pain. But it is nice that he is trying, mine was not trying at all lol, but anyway you can try something to make her forget about this thing, that she will be in pain this first time.  You should find a peaceful place for you two, a place where she can totally relax. Of course, start with foreplay, that will help for sure. Take it slow, don't rush. There is no need for this. If she can't take the pain if she is really in pain - stop and try again later.

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Don't enter her before she's ready. Ask her to tell you when. Use lubricant. Take responsibility for the birth control, so that she can relax. (Learn to use a condom ahead of time. Practice.) Once you enter her, thrust slowly.
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Hi guys....
Oh my god. This is so embabracing, but I don't know with who else I can share it. Please don't laugh on me. Well, I have a bf. He is really
really cuteand I love him alot, but I don't wanna have sex just yet. I dont wanna lose my verignity. I 'm still a vergin, or at least I hope so.
He was here today and well, we kissed and he was touching me and then I felt his hand inside my jeans. I was stupid and I didn't protest so
he....well, I guess u know what happened. Any how he went back home. I went with him to the metro and then I saw that his shirt had some
few stains....like orange-red colour stains....and I asked him. Then he was confused too and after a few minutes he remembered that he had
felt his finger wet so he had dried it with his shirt!!!!!!! sh*t!!!!! Then we checked his finger and there were a few red stains under his nails too.
This can't be possible!!! I didn't even feel a pain and I haven't had my period too! And GOD DAMN IT, it can't just happen with a finger. I have
alwasy heard that the pain is terrible, but I didn't even feel a little of it. BUT then why was his finger bloudy and ...the stains on his shirt? What
is that supposed to mean??????? I am so confused. I wanted to cry, but he managed to prevent that. He didn't want it to happen either. AND
FOR GOD'S SAKE if we really wanted it, then we could have had sex instead of all this nonsense!!! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE some one help me!
Tell me what's going on? What has happened? Why is it all feeling so odd????? It can't really be possible, can it? I AM still a vergin! Am I?

HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPP!!!!

Lilly
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Lily, I hate to be the barer of bad news but girl to girl, worse case scenario your hymen(thin layer of membrane covering the vaginal canal) may have broken. BUT DON'T FREAK!!!! The hymen is more symbolic than anything. If he penetrated it with his finger, he hasn't robbed you of your virginity.

It all depends on how YOU view it. Many people view loss of virginity on a whole spectrum of infinite possibilities. For example, some people believe the moment you have any form of contact with any genitalia other than your own, or someone touches your genitalia, the entire virgin gig is over. HOWEVER, I see loss of virginity as the moment when his penis enters your vaginal canal.

Lily you are still a virgin. Some women are born with out a hymen anyway. Don't fret. You haven't "lost it". Not yet.

BEST WISHES!!!
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hello everyone.
i am so sad and depressed that i have been crying for months now.my boyfriend loved me alot.i lost my virginity with him.but then i found out he was actually cheating on me.now i am so scared about lossing my virginity.i was 18 when i first had it with him.i got a very little bleeding the first time we did it.after we did it everyday for a week but i never bleed.and we always use to make other precautions so nothing happened that could cause me an infection or something.but i am depressed and i want my virginty back.can anyone tell me that if i dont do sex for 2 or more years my Hymen will grow back?
if i dont do sex or fingering or anything else,then after when i will be married am i going to be like i was when i was a virgin? can i hide it from my husband that time?
please help me anyone.i am too confused how to handle it.it has been a year now that i have not done sex,but recently i just tried to put something inside me just to see if i am tight again....and i was shocked that it went in and it didnt even hurt me.=:::-(
what should i do now?
i dont want my future husband to find out that i had it with someone else before
please help me....
desperatly waiting for a reply =;;;(
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I'm sorry to say this but your hymen will not get back if you don't have sex for a long time. If you had an sexual intercourse with your partner you lost your virginity then.
The thing that you are trying to do can be done by plastic surgery. I don't know how exactly is this been done, but maybe someone here can explain to you. Or you can look for it at Cosmetic Plastic Surgery forum.
If you have more questions feel free to asked them.
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Mistrusted18,

I feel so sorry, I can really tell you're hurting over this :( I know that there are "myths and legends" about the hymen returning... many cases in which people claim that they know someone who's hymen has grown back... but that's just it they're MYTHS. I can't find any actual medical or scientific evidence that this is possible anywhere on the web.

But you can't get yourself so bent out of shape about this. I know you regret what you did, at least that's how it sounds. But at the time you loved him, and you said he loved you. And I know that it's hard how things ended, like a knife in the back. But until it is proven, I'll stand by the fact that the hymen cannot be regrown.

If you want to get married, I know for some women that being a virgin for their husband is important, however, I believe that your husband should love you just as you are. Virgin or not. Otherwise what's the point of getting married? If you try to go above and beyond to hide that you'd already lost your virginity from your husband, if you try to erase it and pretend it never happened, you'll feel more guilt than anything else.

PS- I know this is hard for you to hear, but the hymen will not grow back, and getting plastic surgery or desperately trying to shield it from your husband won't make you feel better.

Wishing You Nothing But Love,

The little Bird on Your shoulder
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i was very young.was just 16 when i met him.he did love me.i know he did.he cant do this to me.maybe i was not satisfying him.we had sex after two years of togetherness.even then it was actually not with my aproval involved.he very kindly and sweetly kind of forced me.saying thats its just fun.and after marraige we will do it so whats the point of not doing it now.and i dont know how it happened.but when i came to know about him cheating on me i tried to kill myself.i cut my wrist.but even then i survived.now i am 19 and i am so depressed.for me being a virgin is very important.i wont ever tell to my husband.i dont want to hurt him.no matter how much the other person loves you but i believe that if he finds out that his wife actually is used before...i guess it does make a very big difference in a relationship.i may agree to ''ToasterStrudel829'' but its just for sometime.maybe after few years he will do sacrism and stuff....i feel so guilty,so used....hearing this that the Hymen will never grow back...you guys cant imagine what went through me.i felt like a 1000watt curent just passed through me.i cried alot.i prayed to God to forgive me.but still i cant accept it that im not a virgin anymore.and as open as anything...:'(
i thank you alot for replying me back.
as i went through depression phase so my phsycarist actually told me that Hymen is very weak in some girls.and i used to do horse riding.even when i had my periods going on.so he told me that i might broke my Hymen at that time even.i dont know its true or he was just relaxing me...but this is what i am going to tell my future husband because i am not strong enough to tell him the truth...
May God shower his blessings on you guys too...thank you so much for answering me.it means alot to me...thanks once again.take care
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I wish you luck, and I'm sorry all of this has hurt you so deeply. <3
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Hi,
I just want to confirm what your therapist said. Horse riding could've caused you to lose your hymen. There is a lot of cases where girls lost their hymens while riding a horse. Even if this is not so common thing it happens. So I don't really know if this could be a possible explanation for losing your hymen, but just wanted to tell you that possibility is there.
It is very understandable that this is very important to you and your future husband.
Best of luck.
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thank you "ToasterStrudel829" for your concern. I hope i accept the reality and get back to normal life soon.
To "dark_red"
well i guess the man cant really find out if the woman has her hymen or not,specially on the first night of marraige.i dont think he is going to examie me first before starting doing things.at that moment the couple is too furious to even talk about the stuff...and just start doin it.
But Thanks alot.You dont know what you have done for me. Atleast i am relaxed now. everyone tells me it was not my fault. i was just being used.i just hate to be pretty now.i hate to be the most popular girl of my school.i wish i had a normal ordinary face so no guy can do things to me as my bf did.
i again thank you guys for helping me out. take loads of care.
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u shouldnt hide ur pretty face cause of wat happened. i know its hard but u have to be strong. and someday ull meet ur future husband and live a happy life.best of luck to u and hope u meet the right guy 4 u
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My gf and i plan on having intercourse for our first time.Ive herd it could be painful and i want to know if there is a way to take the pain away from her or to ease the pain. also im 8 inches long will i hurt her is it too big. i just want her to be painfree. i dont want to mess things up with her can anyone give me some tips please.is there a certain way to doing it. i feel really embarresed asking but i care for my gf and want her to have the least pain as possible
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