I have a stay put philosophy at cross roads in life. I stay in a less than ideal relationship...it does feel like home though.

   18 years of a bad relationship and raising kids at a young age, I left, I felt I had no choice. hindsight being 20/20 it may not have been the best for all, but faced with trying to figure out what to do all over again, I honestly can't see doing it any differently. I loved being a mom and I miss my kids. They are adults now, I see them sometimes.

   I think I feel safe where I am and maybe the novelty of that hasn't worn off yet. Like I have a say in what happens in my life. I am starved for affection, and my body image suffers, but I know I get to decide how I feel about me, and time is kind of balancing it out, but I also believe I am worthy of love, and maybe I am depriving myself by staying here, I do get lonely. I feel restless and I'm getting older and I'm not going to be taken care of here. 

Any thoughts?