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I know as long that please please please read all the way through. My friends birthday is next week and she's only one who knows about this.I'm going to kill myself because I feel useless and worthless. People say I'm annoying and loud. Everyday I go to school I sell heated and disgusting. I'm bisexual and I'm dating this girl.people in the class play who would you or dare game. Someone said: if you could shoot anyone who would you shoot. My cousin and 3 other people send me because im annoying and loud. I cut myself with a knife that day. Ive wanted to myself for the past year. I told my friend is going to kill myself yesterday but she said that was destroyed her birthday party. So I decided to move it to the week after her birthday party. I've told one other person and they told me to call someone.anonymous hotline.I told her no. I don't know what to do anymore my mom seems to hate me now she has this new boyfriend and all they've done was hung out with each other. He's been over for 9 days straight and he slept over for 6 of those. Most of your going to say you're stupid and crazy or this just a cry for help. I was molested when I was 5 years old more than once by the same person and have never told anyone except for my extremely close friend. I've posted a couple of these on different sites but everyones answer were horrible. I need help I just want to overdose right now. People talk about me in school and say I'm annoying people yell at me and I get angry so I walked outta class. People don't like me. People die everyday and people are born when someone dies. I'm a Christian girl and I feel worthless hated and like a waste of space. I'm going to kill myself on the 14 of April. I highly doubt my mom will care who will care is my best friends and God.I really need help can someone please help me?! Please don't say you're stupid or you're crazy I've heard that way too many times. That's actually what is pushing me towards the edge. Thank you to everyone who has read this and is responding to this you can ask any kind of question personal questions if you want to but they have to help you with the answer. Please and thank you for reading this.

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Dear Abby

What you say about your current situation and what happened 7 years ago are two different things, although probably linked. You can't change waht happened 7 years ago, but you can change now. We will need to think about how you can deal with the effect of the past. It may well help to report the molestation (it is no longer time-limited in Minnesota since last year), but whether or not anything happens to your abuser, you can still change your situation now. Remember, your molestor was an adult, and he was at fault - not you. Some children feel partially to blame if they enjoyed some of the sensations at the time, but you are not to blame at all, even if any of the feelings were nice at some time. The adult is in the wrong, not you.

You say you are a Christian girl, and only God and a few friends love you. At least that is a start. Killing yourself is not the answer. Apart from anything else, how would that effect your firends? But if you trust God, trust Him to help you through your situation and deal with your anger. Ask for His help. Tell Him all your feelings, frustrations and fears. You may feel worthless, but you are in fact great worth, especially in God's sight. You can ask for His help to deal with the past and the present also.

You have invited personal questions, so let me ask a few so that I can understand you better. It will also help you.

  1. What specifically makes you feel useless?
  2. What is it that makes you feel worthless?
  3. What exactly happened to you when you were molested?
  4. How often did it happen?
  5. How did you feel and respond at the time?
  6. Have those feelings changes over time? In what way?
  7. What church do you attend?
  8. Will you tell me something about your faith, please?

 

 

 

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Hey ive thought about killing myself so many times but knowing one person cared stopped me. I started changing what i look like and started ignoring what they said and found amazing friends and i have an amazing boyfriend now.i started being with his friends and i found people like me who helped me. I think u should really think about it before you do it.
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1. When people make a comment on what I'm doing or like my mom will say I just want to punch you or strangle you... 2.ill ask people to be quiet and they will say Abby shut the f**k up!!! People are just REALLY REALLY mean to me.
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3.he would come into the room and say let's play but most of the time I was sleeping. 4.i slightly enjoyed it but he always creeped me out.
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1. What sort of things were you doing when your mom says she wants to strangle you? Also, people are often mean.
2. What is being said when you ask people to be quiet and they tell you to shut up?
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3. If he would just "come into the room and say let's play but most of the time I was sleeping", how is that molestation? What else did he do? What did you do?

4. When you "slightly enjoyed it", what exactly did you enjoy? How did he creep you out?

You haven't said what exactly makes you feel useless. I am sure you can be useful. I believe you have learnt ASL, so at least that must make you useful.

There are a number of my questions you haven't answered. Would you answer them please?

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Are you a pervert!!! Eres un pervertido loco idiota
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5.Feeling respond about what...
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Certainly not! But you did say: "any kind of question personal questions if you want to" and my questions are always "to help you with the answer". I am trying to get a picture of what physically happened, and how that impacted on you to lead to your expressed suicidal intentions and the relationships with your colleagues and mother. If you don't want help, then I will spend my time trying to help those who do. If you do, then co-operate with supplying sufficient information. Others have tried to answer your various posts in a general way without asking personal questions, and you have not seemed to appreciate their responses. So it is up to you.
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The question was: How did you feel and respond at the time? I was trying to ascertain how you felt physically and emotionally at the time, whether you had sexual responses you enjoyed or that repulsed you, and what you may have said or done as a result. The next question was how your feelings and responses changed over the duration of whatever activity took place, and how your attitude to those events and your feelings concerning them have altered since that activity took place.
Maybe he just touched your vulva; maybe he went further and stimulated your clitoris; maybe he even penetrated your vagina; perhaps more. Maybe he got you to touch him or masturbate him; maybe there was oral sex. This could have been accompanied by things he said including threats and blackmail. Maybe some of this you enjoyed for a while; perhaps some you hated; perhaps there were mixed feelings. Maybe, as time went by, he did more than before. Maybe as you got older your memories have caused you pain, and you now view them differently. Maybe you still have the same feelings, but feel guilty.
Whatever happens to him, you have to deal with the past.
You have said you won't visit counsellors or therapists who will probably ask similar questions to what I have asked. You have the opportunity here to relatively anonymously talk about your experiences and get informed help.
Or perhaps you just want to vent your anger on everyone, and maybe that's why you get the responses from others that you report.
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Ok yeah I'm wrong for saying that... It just seemed creepy at the time I'll answer your question...
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5.i was scared but it felt kinda nice. I told him to stop but he didn't. He would come in when I spent the night and pull down my pants and start rubbing it.
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6.yes they have... I've been uncomfortable around men. I usually hide or leave if a guy that I don't know comes in my class or my moms boyfriend I go to my room the entire time.
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7.My family is busy so we don't go to church anymore 8.what do you mean... I'm confused...
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