I've tried to have sex once before and it didn't work. Why? Because it hurt like crazy. He didn't even get in but it hurt. I don't know why. I talked to my grandmother about it and to answer her questions: Yes there was foreplay, yes I was wet. I'm not even all that interested in sex, honestly. The thought of it scares me. I can't imagine the pain it would cause me, and when I think about it, I nearly burst into tears.... my grandmother says I might need surgery like one of my mom's friends did.... but I'm also terrified of surgery and going to a doctor and having them stick something up there. Help!!! :'(
I think the answers are there in your posting.
First, you're not all that interested in sex. BINGO. If you're not into it, you're not into it. So don't do it.
Second, even though you were wet and had foreplay, you're still fearful, and that can make entry very difficult, if not impossible.
You need to be honest with your boyfriend. He needs to know that it's not him that you're rejecting... it's just that you're not ready and not interested in that right now.
Also, you may be right. There are some women whose hymen will not break, and need a little snip or two to help open them up.
However, it's only for a doctor to consider after an examination.
You sound fearful of "them sitcking something up there". And that's alright. Your fears are yours and no one can sweep them away.
It sounds like you've never had a GYN exam, and so, the whole concept of inserting something is foreign to you.
I wouldn't have sex or attempt it until after you've seen a doctor and been examined.
They can help determine if it's nerves, or a tough, thick hymen, or if you're even ready for sex.
But from the tone of your posting, you're not. So don't let anyone talk you into it. Not yet. Not until you are comfortable.
And, not until you have some protection so that you're sure not to regret this.
Good luck... talk with the nurses and the doctor about where you are at right now.
And make sure your boyfriend understands that you're not ready. If he cares about you, he'll try to understand and not pressure you.
First, you're not all that interested in sex. BINGO. If you're not into it, you're not into it. So don't do it.
Second, even though you were wet and had foreplay, you're still fearful, and that can make entry very difficult, if not impossible.
You need to be honest with your boyfriend. He needs to know that it's not him that you're rejecting... it's just that you're not ready and not interested in that right now.
Also, you may be right. There are some women whose hymen will not break, and need a little snip or two to help open them up.
However, it's only for a doctor to consider after an examination.
You sound fearful of "them sitcking something up there". And that's alright. Your fears are yours and no one can sweep them away.
It sounds like you've never had a GYN exam, and so, the whole concept of inserting something is foreign to you.
I wouldn't have sex or attempt it until after you've seen a doctor and been examined.
They can help determine if it's nerves, or a tough, thick hymen, or if you're even ready for sex.
But from the tone of your posting, you're not. So don't let anyone talk you into it. Not yet. Not until you are comfortable.
And, not until you have some protection so that you're sure not to regret this.
Good luck... talk with the nurses and the doctor about where you are at right now.
And make sure your boyfriend understands that you're not ready. If he cares about you, he'll try to understand and not pressure you.