I have been on this board watching reading and feeling helpless. I was on H- a year, methadone 95mg a year( worst cold turkey ever. My clinic helped after day 14 all I needed was a good sleep I felt. 2 days later I got and it helped my mental health 100%) . Now the chaos starts. My x wife said don't make me go through this again. I did, 1 party and a shot later 2.5 years of hard running. OK now to the present hour 58 and I am having a good day. The fatigue sucks but you gotta get out. My mood is good, went to the store after reading a post about loperamide hc1 2mg. It was a angel. During previous detoxs I wouldn't sleep for days. I got 6 he's total 4.5 at the end. That's amazing to me. We all hate the mental thing. I'm rambling I know but once you want to stop with all the detox bull you will. I never wanted to, till I don't see my 2 year old as much. I lost countless dollars. I lost my anchor. So now I'm detoxing in a freezing cold snow bliss. All alone. So that's why I thank you. I read these posts till I fall asleep. Its always uplifting to read peoples story's on how its going good. Then you don't see the SN no more.