Hello to all of you who have posted your experiences with bi-polar mates on this website. I would like to share some of the major down sides to being with a bi-polar mate who is in denial of his condition and who refuses to seek treatment for it. It can be pure hell dealing with them because according to their way of thinking, they are never wrong. You are always the blame for everything that goes wrong in their life. Folks that is not an easy place to be. However, the reason why I'm sharing this post with you today is because of extreme circumstances that have happened recently. In order for you to fully understand what you are partaking in when you decide to become deeply involved with someone who is bi-polar; let me sum it up for you.
I met my bi-polar exboyfriend 10 years ago. During those 10 years we broke up 5-6 times with him being the catalyst of course. No, I was not a perfect angel but I did not deserve the treatment I received from him. During our first year of us being together as a couple he cheated on me and told me that he didn't love me anymore. Then one week later he came back to me stating that he didn't love the girl and that he wanted to be with me and he is so "sorry". I of course took him back knowing that he had a bi-polar condition (his sister hinted it to me a few times). He has not been properly diagnosed as a bi-polar individual but believe me when I say; me and his immediate family know that he is definitely just that. Getting back to the present; after dealing with him on and off for 10 years I finally cut him off for good for 2 1/2 years now. I thought I was over him and what he had done to me. He used to mentally abuse me by telling me I was a cheater and a "w****" and that I was a very mean-spirited individual. I've never once cheated on him and was always honest with him. He also told me that I was a liar and a phony individual (does all of this sound familiar folks?).
Nowadays, I have been dating this great gentleman for 1 1/2 years and he has been treating me great! He's definitely not bi-polar and he has his head on straight mentally. However, guess who's being the jerk in this relationship? You guessed right folks... it's me. Because I endured all of my ex's mental abuse for all of those years I eventually became....JUST LIKE HIM!!! They are not lying when they tell you to be careful of the company you associate yourself with because 9 times out of 10 you pick up on their ways....good or bad. Unfortunately, I picked up on his bad habits. Instead of me being the victim of verbal and physical abuse my wonderful boyfriend is now the victim. I did not want to inflict my pain on him but unfortunately, I did and I feel a tremendous amount of pain, regret, and sorrow for treating him this way. In the near future, I will seek professional help so that I can be the good woman that I know I am and be a great wife to my boyfriend one day.
No one ever tells you that when you decide to stay with someone who is bi-polar for a long time, you run the chance of becoming just like them in the future! Folks, please be careful about who you spend your time and your life with for your own sakes. If not, your mental health will be in jeopardy and you will be a lost, hurt individual. I hope I have reached someone out there who thinks it's okay to stay with someone who is in denial of their mental condition. I wish you all well.
Thank you & I completely agree. I hope you are getting help now.