So my boyfriend recently decided that we should stop having sex because he felt guilty since we're not married and he comes from a religious family so that's what he's been taught. I do understand, I too felt guilty as well but I can say that it never stopped me. So now that he's actually decided we can't I know that he definitely wont and we can't get married for a few more years... YEARS... do you hear me? YEARS! lol soooo..... I'm wondering if this has happened to anyone else and can offer me words of wisdom and how to not get angry with him because it is rather frustrating that after a few years together he just now randomly decided this...
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It COULD be from something else! Like lack of erection etc. It's a bit late to be having a guilty conscionsce AFTER he has done it for awhile! See if this is REALLY the reason! Ask him if he is still masturbating - because according to most religious readings, masturbation is also immoral and agaisnt the law!
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He doesn't masturbate, I mean I don't see him 24/7 but he said he's never been into that b/c of his religious background and he wont even look at dirty pictures (of course... this is all when I'm around, he says he doesn't do it alone but only he knows that one for sure). I know it's not due to lack of erection... trust me... but it's just kind of random to me that he's just now decided this. It makes me feel... I guess insecure and unattractive to him. I am trying my best to respect his personal feelings and beliefs but it's hard when my own selfishness and personal feelings come into play. I guess I just take it personally when I know I shouldn't.. it's just a major change in our relationship that makes me feel insecure. Perhaps this is just dumb on my part though. He says it'll make it more special when we're married and when we are "allowed" and "supposed" to have sex.
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There HAS to be a reason for the quick turn around! I think it could be from someone finding out OR he has been feeling guilty all along! The way I see it, no matter what commandment or sin that has happened it HAS happened! It's kind of like RE-VIRGINIZE!!! ;-) XD
He better have a ring on your finger come Valentines DAy!!! XD XD Was he really religious before?
He better have a ring on your finger come Valentines DAy!!! XD XD Was he really religious before?
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I wish there was going to be a ring on my finger for valentines day! He used to be really religious then he went off to college and stopped going to church because he was so busy studying and being stressed out. He's just about done (then we plan on getting married). He has told me that he wants to go back to church again because it gives him a feeling of completeness in his life. He doesn't like the fact that he hardly ever attends church anymore and I think that his decision to go back to church goes hand in hand with his decision to not have sex anymore. He has, indeed, always felt guilty about sex before marriage but he said he never truly knew why until he decided to get back into the swing of religion. He kind of walked away from religion for a while and is now going back to it... so in doing so our relationship is changing.... which is hard/confusing for me. I think it's wonderful that he's going to start going to church again and I feel like an id**t for having an issue with not having sex anymore, it's just a rather large change that makes me feel insecure about myself for some reason.
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