Hi,
well it seams that you didn't posted it twice. :-)
And good for you. I am very happy to hear that you said NO. I really would like you to continue doing that. It is going to be hard, but as I said earlier you are strong and you proved it.
And talk to your wife. Tell her that she has to understand you in these situations. It is very important that you have her support.
well it seams that you didn't posted it twice. :-)
And good for you. I am very happy to hear that you said NO. I really would like you to continue doing that. It is going to be hard, but as I said earlier you are strong and you proved it.
And talk to your wife. Tell her that she has to understand you in these situations. It is very important that you have her support.
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I have a good friend who quit some powerful drugs (I think it was coke but I'm not totally sure). Unfortunately, the hardest part of quitting substances is cutting people out of your life who sell you stuff and do drugs with you. It's so hard because basically you have to get an entirely different group of friends. Have you started to do that? I'm glad your wife is supportive too! And I'm glad to hear that we've been helpful. I'm glad you'er getting back to normal :)
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I'm trying to get a new group of friends. I still talk to one person that I really do consider a friend due to how much c**p we've dealt with together. We've actually protected one another.
But, the point still remains that she does remind me of all my drugs of choice and she hasn't stopped nor is she really planning to.
I must say though, she's not as bad as I was/am. I'm not sure exactly how to put that, whether it should be in past tense or not considering the fact that I can't really see myself as "clean" just yet.
That's one of the hardest parts of this ... Finding new friends and all that. I don't really want to make memories with a whole bunch of new people, but, maybe that's just that addict part of me still talking.
But, the point still remains that she does remind me of all my drugs of choice and she hasn't stopped nor is she really planning to.
I must say though, she's not as bad as I was/am. I'm not sure exactly how to put that, whether it should be in past tense or not considering the fact that I can't really see myself as "clean" just yet.
That's one of the hardest parts of this ... Finding new friends and all that. I don't really want to make memories with a whole bunch of new people, but, maybe that's just that addict part of me still talking.
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My suggestion would be to find new friends. Communications with other people would be positive benefit for you. I think it would be much easier for you to put aside your past and turn to good and positive future. Make your self a check point from time to time. Go through them and you will see that you are on a good road. If you happen to miss one, just go back to previous one and continue from there.
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I am sure that it would be really hard at first but I know for a fact is that it is really worth it. I think the best thing for you to do is recognize when you're worried about something and when you're being realistically concerned. Making new friends is a worry--seems like a big deal, but it isn't. Being concerned about something would be like your health if you have odd symptoms or if your wife is not able to call you or something like that. Does that make sense?
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Hi seasiren,
Well it's been a few days since your last post here, so I'm just wondering how you been. Have you managed to lower the dose down?
If you have any questions about anything just ask.
It is nice to talk to you. :-)
All the best,
Red
Well it's been a few days since your last post here, so I'm just wondering how you been. Have you managed to lower the dose down?
If you have any questions about anything just ask.
It is nice to talk to you. :-)
All the best,
Red
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I've had a very tough few days.
As far as my dose goes it hasn't been lowered yet.
How have you been doing lately? Sorry I haven't posted much lately ... Like I said it's just been tough lately.
As far as my dose goes it hasn't been lowered yet.
How have you been doing lately? Sorry I haven't posted much lately ... Like I said it's just been tough lately.
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NO worries about not posting. Just let us know if there's anything we can help with or if you need to vent or anything. That's what we're here for :)
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I'm sorry to hear that you have been bad these few days. If there is anything that we can do, just ask. We will help you as much as we can.
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Thank you guys so much for letting me know that you are here for me. I really need that right now.
I feel so alone and so depressed.
Yesterday marked me being clean for 30 days and instead of me being happy and proud of myself for it I feel awful and I want to do "those things" again so bad.
I'm just wondering when I'm going to mess up again, ya know?
I feel that it's just a matter of time before I slip and fall right on my face because I feel like I need to do it again so bad.
I keep thinking in my head, "One more time and then I'll stop for good." and I know that's not at all how it works. That "One more time" will turn in to a few days more and then a few months more and I know that.
But the pull is so strong sometimes.
Sorry to put all that on you guys ...
I appreciate all of you listening to me and being so caring and concerned ... I really do.
I've never talked to people that are as compassionate and kind like you all are.
So hugs to all of you! :-)
I feel so alone and so depressed.
Yesterday marked me being clean for 30 days and instead of me being happy and proud of myself for it I feel awful and I want to do "those things" again so bad.
I'm just wondering when I'm going to mess up again, ya know?
I feel that it's just a matter of time before I slip and fall right on my face because I feel like I need to do it again so bad.
I keep thinking in my head, "One more time and then I'll stop for good." and I know that's not at all how it works. That "One more time" will turn in to a few days more and then a few months more and I know that.
But the pull is so strong sometimes.
Sorry to put all that on you guys ...
I appreciate all of you listening to me and being so caring and concerned ... I really do.
I've never talked to people that are as compassionate and kind like you all are.
So hugs to all of you! :-)
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Hi seasiren,
It is really good that you are fighting this as much as you can. It seams that you are clear minded that you can not do this again. Not for once. As you said it yourself if you try it "just once", than you will continue to take it again. Be strong and resit it.
I hope that you partner is there for you.
It is really good that you are fighting this as much as you can. It seams that you are clear minded that you can not do this again. Not for once. As you said it yourself if you try it "just once", than you will continue to take it again. Be strong and resit it.
I hope that you partner is there for you.
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My partner is there for me ... it's just that I don't always want to talk about what's bothering me.
I don't talk to her as often about things like this as I should. Sometimes it makes it a little better and other times it makes it 10 times worse.
I don't know what to do to be honest ... I know that I'd like to have extra spending money instead of using it all up and having nothing to show for it but ... Then when I think about it again it almost sounds worth it ...
I'm trying to keep focused and keep my mind occupied but god it gets hard sometimes..
I don't talk to her as often about things like this as I should. Sometimes it makes it a little better and other times it makes it 10 times worse.
I don't know what to do to be honest ... I know that I'd like to have extra spending money instead of using it all up and having nothing to show for it but ... Then when I think about it again it almost sounds worth it ...
I'm trying to keep focused and keep my mind occupied but god it gets hard sometimes..
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I know that sometimes you don't always want to talk about what's bothering you but that's a lot of anxiety as far as I can see it. When you feel like you shouldn't talk is the exact moment you need to talk! I would speak up and tell your partner how you're feeling just so she can help you. You've made it 30 days! That's huge! And it just gets easier from here, okay? Just keep posting and talking and fighting. You'll beat this for good. I just know it. :)
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I can always suggest that if you can't talk to your partner talk with us. We are here to listen to you. We don't really know who are you but we know your personality. You are a good person, and a strong one. Like healthnfitnessguy said, 30 days is huge. Keep on the fight until YOU win.
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What you two have said makes a BIG difference!
I couldn't agree more when you said that when I feel like not talking is the exact moment that I should.
I just always worry that I'm putting too much on my partner, you know? I don't want her to have added stress because of me.
I am warning you guys though ... For a couple more days I will need your support and I appreciate you guys MORE than you could EVER know!
Just knowing that I have other people supporting me really does give me that extra push that I need to kick start my a$$ in the RIGHT gear!
I want you guys to also know that if YOU ever need ANYTHING ... Just someone to vent to, talk to, kill time with .. ANYTHING .. I'm there for all of you because you've been there for me when I needed it the most, like now for example!
I appreciate all that you've said and all the kindness that you've shown me.
HUGS TO YOU ALL!
I couldn't agree more when you said that when I feel like not talking is the exact moment that I should.
I just always worry that I'm putting too much on my partner, you know? I don't want her to have added stress because of me.
I am warning you guys though ... For a couple more days I will need your support and I appreciate you guys MORE than you could EVER know!
Just knowing that I have other people supporting me really does give me that extra push that I need to kick start my a$$ in the RIGHT gear!
I want you guys to also know that if YOU ever need ANYTHING ... Just someone to vent to, talk to, kill time with .. ANYTHING .. I'm there for all of you because you've been there for me when I needed it the most, like now for example!
I appreciate all that you've said and all the kindness that you've shown me.
HUGS TO YOU ALL!
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