How often do you walk around in a fog, not present in your body, not present with your feelings, and not present with your Guidance?
Now take a moment to think about this - how often are you not present because you are stuck in fear, obligation, or guilt - FOG?
That's where I used to live. My wounded self was relentless in telling me things that created the FOG feelings. My wounded self had been deeply programmed with hundreds of beliefs that invariably created the FOG feelings.
"Did you remember to turn the flame off on the stove. No, I'm sure you didn't and the house is going to burn down and your children will die."
"Sandra invited you to her party and you don't want to go but you know you will hurt her feelings and that’s not okay. She will think you don't care - that you are not a caring person, so you have to go to prove that you care."
"He's angry and it must be your fault. You didn't do something right - again. He's probably angry because you are not sexy enough."
"He feels hurt because you want to read your book tonight. It's not okay to read your book if he is upset about it."
"Mom's angry that I didn't call her this week. You are not a caring daughter."
On and on. Of course it never occurred to me that others weren't caring about me when they were angry and blaming and guilting. I couldn’t even think that thought because then my wounded self would really get into gear:
"Don't be so selfish. You are selfish if you do what you want if others are upset about it. You are selfish if you don't go to the party. You are selfish if you don't have sex when he wants it. You are selfish if you read your book when he wants to make love. You are selfish for not calling your mother."
It wasn't until Inner Bonding that I discovered that taking care of myself was loving instead of selfish, and discovered that it was not only my responsibility to take care of myself, but my right. It was through Inner Bonding and getting connected with my Guidance that I discovered that when someone expected me to give myself up for them instead of take loving care of myself, they were the ones being selfish. Learning that was huge for me.
It was from my Guidance that I learned that when someone blamed me for being selfish, it was often a projection of their own selfishness. They were trying to guilt me into caretaking them instead of taking care of myself.
It was through my Guidance that I learned that acting out of fear, obligation, and guilt was not only unloving to me, it was also unloving to others, because in giving to them from my FOG feelings, I had an agenda that they give to me what I was not giving to myself.
Operating out of fear, obligation and guilt is operating in the FOG of my wounded self, while operating out of love, caring and compassion, for myself and others, takes me out of the FOG and into the clarity of mind that comes when I am guided by Spirit rather than by my wounded self.