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Hi, when you are reading this, I do not intend to offend you.

Well, I'm a 13 year old straight boy, and for a while now I haven't liked gay people. It's just that they kinda creep me out and stuff. Whenever I think about what gay people do it makes me cringe a little.

Does this count as homophobia, because I'm not really sure. I never offend gay people, for example, calling them 'faggots' or other stuff, I just don't really like them I suppose.

One of my old friends announced he was bisexual about 6 months ago. Since then we really haven't spoke much. He was talking about his boyfriend once, and it made me feel a little sick. Is this normal? Is this bad?

A person I know always call's me a homophobic, and I just say I'm not, because like I already said, I don't offend (or try not to) gay people.


Welcome to the thought-police of the 21st century.

If someone says 'here's what I do and you have to enjoy it or you're phobic. Which technically means afraid of, not nauseated by, so you can't be homophobic by being nauseated, by definition - but try telling 'them' that - who's them - whoever wants to control you by attacking your right to have an opinion.

Respecting someone's right to stick their penis up their friend's backside does not mean you are required to enjoy the thought of it.

Some people go down on women during their periods - that makes others gross out: what does that make them? Bloodophobic? Haemophobic? Vaginaphobic? Ask a gay guy to eat out a woman, and that will probably gross him out. Since when were gays accused of being femophobic?

Today there are a lot more people telling people what to be afraid of: not sufficiently afraid of Islam? Arrange a terrorist incident (arranged by whom incidentally), because that gives you a great excuse to invade and take their oil (wrong country guys, or didn't you get the memo?)

Speak up for the rights of women? You're in violation of God - something both Far Right Christians and Catholics and Islam agree on: go figure. Christians and Catholics as anti-abortion activists, Islam because, hell, they're women, and many sects and cultures on that side of the fence consider it a matter of honour to kill their own daughter for kissing a guy: I'm not making this up, go read what Islamic women who escaped their society are saying? Does that mean I'm Islamophobic? Hardly. I just find it nauseating that anyone can so desecrate the divine as to kill their own daughter. And as you can tell, I don't have much time for Christian Right either.

So what do I believe in? I believe that every human being has the right to discover what is right for them, what works for them, what feels good about life for them. If you haven't interfered with two of your friends having sex - which act would be illegal no their part anyway, homo or hetero, then why should they care?

If they want to pick a fight, pick one: ask them if they're heterophobic? Why are they so afraid of what hetero's think? If homosexuality is so natural, why would they be afraid you find it unnatural? It's their guilty conscience talking, so you can either have fun with it, which makes you intelligent, not homophobic, or you can ignore it, and say, you know, there are many things I don't like or find appealing, and many, I suspect that you wouldn't find appealing either: does that make you phobic also?

When someone attacks you for having an opinion, they're the aggressor. Why would you want to tolerate having an aggressor either as a friend or in the vicinity. Tell them, 'you know, I'm really glad you brought that up, because it reminds me that I really am a better human being than you, because I have the confidence to be open about how I feel, and I recognise the wisdom and wonder of a divine plan that makes us all different, and unique, and special in our own way. I can certainly see the divine in you - you have lovely cheekbones by the way - it's a great shame you can't see the divine in me.'

And when they come arrest me for having the temerity to be on your side, you raving homophobic, well, I hope we'll stand there together.

Just not holding hands.