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Hi, I have anul sex problems. I find it very irritating to use a vibrator against the rectum, but also with a partner, it is a problem for me. How can I solve it?

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Hi, many people of both sexes and of all sexual orientations partake in anal sex. Usually rimming, inserting a finger in the rectum during oral sex, using butt plugs or dildos, using a vibrator against the rectum, stroking the rectal opening are applied. In anal intercourse full or partial insertion of the penis inside the anus is used. Sexually transmitted diseases can be transmitted like this. If you use any object it can get stuck in anus, and cause you trouble. Also, pay attention not to tear the lining of the rectum, specially if you have hemorrhoids. Some are also concerned about coming into contact with fecal masses, but it is usually not the case.
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Could I also ask to elaborate on the last point re fecal masses - I have looked at the anatomy diagrams but why is this so? Usually how long after passing motion would the anus canal be clear of fecal masses and be safe for intercourse? I guess most importantly does the body actually actively clear the canal entirely after passing motion as in retain any not passed down back into the lower bowel? I would have thought that intercourse interchangeably between anal and vaginal isn't recommended due to the passing of bacteria. However I would like to hear an educated view on this especially since the pros seem to be alternating between both without any concern and also full oral after the fact as well to boot! Please explain thanks. I'm sure I'm not the only one perplexed.
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Finnn,
You are right to be concerned.
With people's pre-occupation and interest in anal sex recently, the risks and concerns seem to be swept aside.

The concern about transmitting bateria from anus to mouth or vagina is a very REAL concern. That's why condoms are recommended for use with ANY anal contact. Certainly, you should not move a finger or penis from anus to any other opening without the thorough scrubbing with soap and water to remove any chance of cross-contamination.

Usually, a routine bowel movement is enough to rid the rectum of any fecal material, but if it's been soft and a mess, perhaps you'll want to skip the anal for the night. At least that seems to be logical to me.

Finally, though some people speak freely about rimming or tounge action on the anus or rectum, I know of no one who does it. It would be essential to use a dental dam or condom for the same reasons outlined above. But frankly, I think this particular kick is vastly over-rated, and publicized solely by some very kinky porno flicks where the actors take huge risks.

In my book, that's too big a risk.

Hope this helped in some way.
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Hear hear - always use a condom and never alternate from anal to vaginal using the same condom or in the same stroke. Common sense seems to be the order with fecal matters ie the body doesn't have any magic answers. Glad you brought up the tongue thing - ya dunno about that one honestly. I mean I can understand it gives pleasure esp if it sets one up for good things but in view of bacteria etc - if there is no guarantee no bacteria exists then its not worth it for the giver.

What are the best positions for newbies especially in terms of alignment so that it has the best chance of being a good experience? I'm sure once experienced one can graduate to the other more adventurous positions?

I keep hearing missionary with male on top and female with legs up onto the shoulder? But I would have thought this position isn't great because the anus canal is in an up incline this way.

What about the lying on the side in a spoon position? Its like doggy except the female is less worried about things going too fast which is half the problem solved in terms of relaxing her.
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