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hi i am engaged to my fiancee and have been with him for over 2 years but he wanted to try anal i let him put didnt really like it i feel like i have let him down plz help

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mornin Kimmy, First of all, one has to like anal sex to begin with as it's an acquired taste. I myself don't like it but every now and then i will let my husband poke me in the pooper. He likes it but it's not something he wants all the time, just once in a while for a change.

It is your absolute right to not like anal sex. If your uncomfortable then you must tell him that your not down with it. If you feel like you can accomodate his desire to do it once in a while, that's ok too. What helps me are a few cocktails lol. It seems to relax me and we do get a little uninhibated when we have a few nips. Also you must be plenty lubed. We don't produce our own natural lubrication out of our butts like our vagina's, so a lot of KY or Astro Glide is 100% needed. And you should be really, really turned on first. If your totally hot and ready, then it works better and it does feel pretty good once it's in there.

You did not let your fiance down at all. He loves you and wants you to feel good too. So just let him know that anal sex is not really one of your specialties and you really prefer it if he doesn't ask for it. But like i said, every once in a while, if you can, is ok.

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You haven't let him down at all. You tried it, you didn't like it. It's not for everyone.
:-) x
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I feel that if a couple will enjoy anal sex then they should beging with mutual foreplay. Both of you can set aside a time when you will explore anal stimulation either until orgasm or you are satisfied. Starting out with using fingers that are well manicured with some water soluable lubricant. I would also suggest using a surgical glove the first few times because you will have fecal mattercome out of the rectum/anus. As you progress you can either have a bowel movement one hour or so prior to your session or use a Fleet enema an hour or so before, or both. As you both become used to and comfortable with anal stimulation, try purchasing a dildo/vibrator the same size as your male companion. Anything bigger than, say 9", 10", is a bit dangerous, but it can be done. Remember, this is still a two way street for both the male and female. So use the sex toy during your sex play until you feel comfortable having actual anal sex. Make sure that you use lots of water lubricant. Avoid vaseline, petroleum jelly, anything that deadens the "pain" of anal sex, and flavored lubes. Petroleum products remain on your tissue inside for awhile and is an excellent medium for bacteria. Ointments like "Analeze" that anesthesize your anus and rectum to stop the feeling of pain is a bad idea. Pain is your primary message to stop right now. Continuing past a pain level will cause a fissure or rupture hemmerhoids.
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I had similar experience.. Didnt enjoyed it much and it was very painful. I was dead for two days. However , we are getting better now. Lots of lube and right mood helps a lot.
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