Im a female, 25, encountering depression and sudden crying episode, out of control outburst with cry, but never maniac. I dont remember being aggressive or agitated or high lately or for no reason.

I experience very bad depression for many reasons like, My moms cancer treatment ongoing, change of city(country), closely attached to my husband hence I mostly outburst or cry when he has to leave me alone home. That thought makes me think of loneliness and losing him. Though I dont feel the same once he drops me at office every morning. And Im very much normal self, though a little drowsy due to certain medications Im using. I just started using the antidepressant since yesterday as prescribed by a psychiatrist. But I have had a bad mid ear infection for the past weeks and was on medication for the same.(thats just antibiotics, which I had taken for 2 long weeks).

My doctor said it could be bipolar but I doubt since I never got the maniac part of it. I just feel lonley and the feel of my husband leaving me alone (once he has to go out for work) haunts me and I end up pleading him for not to leave me alone, or not to be angry at me (though he is sweet but irritated as his work demands his presence). The day before it happened to me that, my husband was about to drop me back home and drive away to office. This thought depressed me, started thinking lot of stuffs, feeling feared, scared, afraid and helpless. And he patted on my knees gently which made me cry out" please dont hit me baby..please dont hit me baby"

Then later yesterday I didnt show the episode as he was with me all the time.But I get very fatigued, tired and sleepy. in sleep Im disturbed often, feeling the loneliness mainly. 

I had an LSD trip two weeks back and I have had MDMA 3 -5 times in my life, which is 8 months back. And I was always normal after the trip gets off.

can any expert help me with what Im dealing with?


I will reply to your further questions if you seem to be helpful.

Thanks for this webforum. Hope to find my help here.