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Me and my ex boyfriend are both 23, we've been dating for awhile and he just broke up with me because "he didn't want to be in a relationship right now" but we keep hanging out a couple times a week and when we did it felt like we were still together. We are both very attracted to each other so we were still having sex. Then my gay friend found him on a gay website and I brought I up to my ex and he denied he made that account , so I eventually just let it go not wanting it to be true. A few weeks later I looked through his texts and saw that he was texting multiple guys and they were flirting and talking about cuddling .. He walked back in the room and he realized what I saw on his phone so we talked about it .. He told me he never met them and he only talks to them. He says he doesn't want to have sex with a man that it's disgusting and he just likes talking to them that way. He said he wants a wife a kids someday but he doesn't know what to do right now .. And I don't know what to so either , I'm not talking to him at this point but I love him so much and want him back . He said one day he might realize he screwed up letting me go because I might be the one but he wants me to move on .. I just don't want to move on .. I can't.. He's all I can ever think about .. It's so weird how he is physically attracted to me and cares about me but wants to talk to guys .. I don't know how to deal with this

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I don't think this is what you would want to hear, but in my opinion this will not work out well for you if you hold on to the hope you and he will ever have a healthy, secure relationship.


Whether he is gay or not only he could ever say, and he sounds confused but at the very least bisexual. Don't waste your life hoping he will change, because he won't. You deserve to have someone who is not at all confused about whether he wants you in his life. The one you share your life with should be one who is certain he wants to share his life with you.


I know a woman in her 60s who is miserable, bitter, unpleasant, and her default facial expression is a frown. She had an affair in her youth with a man who turned out to be gay and she never gave up hope that he would change. She wasted her entire life and he never changed. He used her when he needed her and she gave in because she thought she loved him. "Maybe this is the day he will fall back in love with me". Cut your losses and run. Heal your broken heart away from him and open up to someone who will love you whole-heartedly. I know this is painful but this is how I feel about your situation. 

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